And if you doubt me dog, you betta out me dog

I'm throw'd off slightly, brah

Oh I see they're still trying to out Queen Latifah. I think I saw this story a while ago but since I'm on a roll with sadness why not. I can't depress myself much more this week--wait.

QUEEN LATIFAH THREATENED THROUGH TABLOIDS

So a make-up artist and a stylist are suing Queen Latifah claiming she owes them $1 million dollars combined. Roxanna Floyd says she’s owed $700,000 on work done between July 2005 and February 2008.

Stylist Susan Moses says she was cheated out of $300,000 during that same period. While the lawsuit has yet to go to court, it’s already spilling over into the gossip pages.

Apparently the two are threatening to go public about Queen Latifah’s private life if they don’t get their cash.

Lawyers for the two told the National Enquirer, “Whether Latifah is gay or straight has absolutely nothing to do with our clients claims,” though they added that “Latifah’s personal life could become an issue in the case as it relates to her treatment of another stylist.”

*rolls eyes backwards until the whites show, trembles, falls backwards and starts clawing at the air*

Bring em out bring em out! Suddenly sounds different.

This is old fucking dumbness but it's still fucking dumbness and that's what we're going for this week.

I really hate it when the gay community tries to force people out. Like, against their will. I mean celebrities, politicians, what have you. Because it's fucking dumb. I used to think it was a good thing but I've realized that being forced to come out is rather scary and hurtful.

"Oh Xands, they're being selfish by staying in the closet!" I beg to differ head voice, for I think you are being fucking selfish by demanding they come out. Especially in this case when we're not even sure that Queen Latifah is...gay.

Do you not get that if it were safe for gays & lesbians and whoever to come out about their differing sexualities that we would all do it? There are hypocrites that stay in the closet because of fear, and then there are people that stay in the closet. It is, frankly, none of our goddamn business. If Latifah wanted to come out, she would have. But threatening to out her and sue her for unpaid fees is some ol bullshit. If you agree with any of that you are also on some ol' bullshit and I really don't care.

As a black person, I don't mind coming out to a few friends every now and then but I am scared to death, really, of coming out to the world. It would not be good. I'd rather run around with an upside down cross and three sixes on my head screaming "GODLESS" than whisper I'm gay. I try to live as openly as I can but it's pretty rare, except in print, that you'll hear me admit to my queerness. It is not good. It would not be good for me to come out to very many people until society changes its fucking dumb views on sexuality.

I look at celebrities that are out, and I do not feel better about coming out. I do not relate to very many of them even in sexuality. They feel safe to come out. I do not. Is Queen Latifah in the same situation? I do not know and I do not give a fuck. Perhaps she feels like Wanda Sykes, who officially came out about last year some time, and said it was just not a big deal or anyone else's business to broadcast. Perhaps Latifah is not gay. Perhaps she is. Perhaps you feel forcing her out of her comfort zone is the way to go. Perhaps you feel those pesky human rights and right to privacy are getting in the way.

Pretty much all of the above just brings me much sadness. And that's the theme of the week!

Let's adopt the children...I guess

So, I've been on a roll it seems with kids lately because the world's been on a roll with them. I told you to stop fucking with the kids but you aren't listenniiinnng~

Let's take it from the bottom with Madonna's continuing adoption saga. I'm so very annoyed.

I don't know when adopting the poor children from Africa became a fad. I don't care. I've been tired of Ye Mighty White and Privileged Kiplings feeling so entitled to go snatch up African children and bring them to the states. I'm sure that while their rich & famous parents are busy erasing any memories of their home & culture they're being provided with the best schools, best education, best life they can have in the glorious United States. And these young black children, when they get older, will be treated just like every minority in the US, with dignity, respec--*snorfle*

Anyway, so you've heard this. Madonna wants to adopt a child named Mercy, Madonna is denied, Madonna freaks out at being denied something for once and goes on a campaign to adopt this child. The problem is, according to Malawi law Madonna can't adopt Mercy because she hasn't lived there for over a year. Madonna don't care none and decides she's going to build a house just so she can adopt her Mercy and whisk her away, away, awaaaay~

...The other problem here is that, uh, Mercy already has a family. I know right, and African child with a family still in tact. The family, quite understandably, doesn't want their child/grandchild to be taken away. Again, fancy that. How dare they stand in the way of Madonna's progress! The other thing is, Madonna already has her token African baby, David, whom hasn't even seen his real father but once since he came to the US and doesn't even know his own language. Niiiice.

I blog about this because I really, really find it outrageous that this woman, this celebrity, feels so ridiculously entitled to go up and adopt her African babies like it's going out of style (and I wish it was) against the family's wishes. Nyarlathotep be freaking praised, is she serious? Kind of like Bob Geldof, she seems to only be interested in Africa on it's knees (wish I remember who said that first).

I used to hate this phrase, you know, back when I too thought Africa was uniformly in the whole, why don't they just adopt American children? Well honestly I'm kind of asking now, why DON'T they just adopt American children, if they want to do something so kind? Why bring them into a unabashedly xenophobic country? Oh the whiteness, it's hurting my eyes! *shields with hands*

Actually, there are some normal folks in America that wouldn't mind seeing American children out of foster homes & orphanages, except the restrictions for those are getting tighter and tighter. There are states *coughfloridaarizonacough* where you can't adopt if you so happen to be not straight. There are states *coughflorida* where you can't adopt if you're single or just unmarried. So many restrictions, so few loopholes, unless you want to adopt an African/Chinese/Indian/ehhh baby from elsewhere in the world, bring them to a country that kind of hates foreigners & colored folks, and why don't they just adopt american and so on and so on and so on and auuuugh.

But I'm not absolving celebrities of any guilt or wrong doing, what the Madonnas and Angelina Jolies are doing is still kinda fucked up *shrug* but what America does is even fucked upper still.

Then I see this article on CNN regarding...oh, whew! its China:

Fewer children up for adoption in China

The Chinese government imposed new regulations in 2007 to limit the number of international applications, putting more restrictions on prospective parents from outside China. The rules basically say you need not apply if you are single, overweight, deformed, taking anti-depressants or poor. China has said the rules are in the best interest of the child.

After leading the world in international adoptions, adoptions in China are slowing down- though it is not clear if there is a link to the new rules. According to the U.S. State Department, Americans adopted 7,906 Chinese children in 2005 - a number that dropped to 3,909 children in 2008.

However, Melody Zhang of Children's Hope International, said it is not that fewer people want to adopt but there are instead simply more Chinese and foreigners who want to adopt and fewer children up for adoption - however, the government does not release data on the numbers of children up for adoption in the country.

"In the past, Chinese people would not consider adopting someone out of the family, but more and more people are educated, and they understand the important part is to raise the child, not necessarily a blood tie," Zhang said.

The Asian giant's growing economy has given more people the means to raise a child, so Chinese parents are less likely to give up their children.

I dunno, I guess you may say that Madonna probably has the right idea, you may say China has the right idea. I've never been quite here or there when it comes to foreign adoptions other than the fact that orphanages typically aren't the nicest places to be (note: extreme understatement ahoy!). I'm just annoyed at the Privileged Ones and their oh-so-entitled-ment. Perhaps there's even a bigger problem at work here...but there always is...

Countee Cullen, that other dude I didn't know about

Of course there's a wealth of literature out there that I'll feel I should know about but either never find out about or just find out too late.

Next week in my Am Lit II class we will be covering Countee Cullen. I might as well just get ready to be pissed, shouldn't I?

Cullen was a poet during the earlier years of the Harlem Renaissance with Langston an'nem, heavily influenced by John Keats, whom I'll be talking about before the month's up, because I loves me some Keats.

Two notable things about Cullen, and you'll soon understand my pre-emptive anger knowing my professor's track record with...stuff:

He was married to Yolanda DuBois, daughter of WEB DuBois

and

She ended up divorcing him when he told her he was attracted to men.

Oh yes, he got married again much more happily, but it seems at the very least Cullen was bisexual...like Langston an'nem. And well, yeah, homosexuality of any sort was a big ol' no-no back in the 30s-40s, and he was doubly pressed being black. Black communities tend/ed to downplay an awful lot some of our heroes and their sexual orientation if it's anything but straight. That's actually something interesting I'd like to get into another time. I think this might just be true of people in general but it seems the trend is especially strong with minority groups...

But now the poetry. If you want more try here.

TO JOHN KEATS, POET, AT SPRING TIME

(For Carl Van Vechten)

I cannot hold my peace, John Keats;
There never was a spring like this;
It is an echo, that repeats
My last year's song and next year's bliss.
I know, in spite of all men say
Of Beauty, you have felt her most.
Yea, even in your grave her way
Is laid. Poor, troubled, lyric ghost,
Spring never was so fair and dear
As Beauty makes her seem this year.

I cannot hold my peace, John Keats,
I am as helpless in the toil
Of Spring as any lamb that bleats
To feel the solid earth recoil
Beneath his puny legs. Spring beats
her tocsin call to those who love her,
And lo! the dogwood petals cover
Her breast with drifts of snow, and sleek
White gulls fly screaming to her, and hover
About her shoulders, and kiss her cheek,
While white and purple lilacs muster
A strength that bears them to a cluster
Of color and odor; for her sake
All things that slept are now awake.

And you and I, shall we lie still,
John Keats, while Beauty summons us?
Somehow I feel your sensitive will
Is pulsing up some tremulous
Sap road of a maple tree, whose leaves
Grow music as they grow, since your
Wild voice is in them, a harp that grieves
For life that opens death's dark door.
Though dust, your fingers still can push
The Vision Splendid to a birth,
Though now they work as grass in the hush
Of the night on the broad sweet page of the earth.

"John Keats is dead," they say, but I
Who hear your full insistent cry
In bud and blossom, leaf and tree,
Know John Keats still writes poetry.
And while my head is earthward bowed
To read new life sprung from your shroud,
Folks seeing me must think it strange
That merely spring should so derange
My mind. They do not know that you,
John Keats, keep revel with me, too.

ETSU's great race survey

Blogging from school everyone. Shh, I can't afford to be seen with radicals.

Edit: Fixed formatting. I still think it's stupid.

I just noticed an email from the school...well...just read it:

Mandatory New Federal Ethnicity and Race Information Collection

Changes to federal requirements for collecting ethnicity and race information require ETSU to resurvey all students, faculty, and staff for this information.

Beginning Monday, April 6, 2009, all users (students, faculty, and staff) are required to log in to GoldLink and provide the following information:

1. Ethnic Category



Do you consider yourself to be of Hispanic/Latino/Spanish origin?

· Yes

· No



2. Race Category



Select one or more of the following racial categories to describe yourself.

· White

· Black or African American

· Asian

· American Indian

· Alaskan Native

· Native Hawaiian or other Pacific Islander

Once this information is submitted, users will return to regular GoldLink services and will not be asked for this information again.

Thank you in advance for participating in this required federal survey,

Offices of Human Resources and Enrollment Services

East Tennessee State University



....What?! NO SIR.

That survey is stupid stupid stupid! What the fuck is an "American Indian"? Why do I have to provide info on any Latin@ ancestory? Explain to me the differences between Latino, Hispanic, AND Spanish (LOL)? Why am I black OR african american like I have a choice? Why so few racial categories? Why no European? If I'm Russian am I Asian or White? Why is this information needed?!

After being called a negro by that stupid student census, the government is going to have to come to my dorm room and A) Deliver an apology B) Ask me nicely with cookies and root beer to fill out anything else ever again! I refuse! I am NOT participating in this fuckery!

Mantyhose and other masculine things

In my Intro to Women's studies class, one of the things we talked about was gender roles of course. Duh, it's a women's studies class.

We talked about things that, at least in America, are deemed masculine and things that are deemed feminine and how that shifts over time.

I thought of none of that when I was looking at this post from Sociological Images talking about that phenomenon of "mantyhose".

The article discusses the UK based site Project E-MANcipation.

From the website: “Project E-MANcipate is a project to accelerate the acceptance of male pantyhose as a regular clothing item.”

Hey, I’m all for men and women wearing pantyhose if they want to (as long as no one makes me wear any) but what sort of “emancipation” is being advocated?

Is this about emancipation men from the confines of masculinity so that they can wear an item associated with femininity?

You can read the whole post for y'selves, its pretty good. Personally I hate pantyhose and have no idea why anyone would willingly choose to wear such a garment. But...I've always seen pantyhose & tights as gender neutral anyway. Despite the fact that they seem to be overwhelmingly be worn by women, you can't forget about athletes and dancers that wear the hose.

Speaking of which, the article talks about how the Project seems intent on masculinizing (I made that up...I think) pantyhose, which is kind of annoying because it just seems like men can't wear a damn garment without making it MANLY MANLY. Pantyhose is gender neutral (and was actually rather masculine at some point anyway, which goes to show how different masculinity is now from back in ye olde day) and I think it should stay that way. Hell, clothes should be gender neutral in general, I think, but I can say that because my closet is technically about 50/50 female/"male" (in quotes because I use the term quite loosely). Bleh, it's silly the gender constructs we build, even sillier when we expect them to stretch across the world.

On the other hand, I have to think of the people that don't really mind or prefer, so much, feminine clothes versus masculine clothes which kind of complicates it, also because I'm that way myself sometimes. Sigh.

I've filled my quota thinky posts for the day!

Zombie post: Appealing to reason, driving towards cynicism

AKA If We Sit and Wait for Shit To Happen, It Won't.

Uh, I know for sure this was a Facebook note but I can't recall if it's here too. No matter, I'm expanding on it anyway. I suck with this updating thing lately. My extra special bloggiversary is coming up anyway so I might just refrain from the usual hourly posting. My edits in Italics.

Anyway, so I was wracking my brain with something interesting to talk about, because I know it's my duty to entertain you all. Whether I feel like it or not. And after scrambling to think of something humorous, I failed, got hungry, then as all starving folks do I got desperately serious.

I thought of something my Af.Am [Ed: Yeah African American, I'm lazy as hell] History prof said as we talked about WEB Dubois. You know Dubois as the polar opposite of Booker T Washington and one of the founders of the NAACP. He did a lot of things, but we talked about his philosophy in class for a while and how, at the beginning of his career, rather than the slave "yessa massa" mentality of Washington (I don't hate the man btw, that's just kinda how it is) Dubois tried desperately to appeal to reason.

The moral of his story, really, is you can't appeal to reason and rationality. Ever. Uh-uh. I say this because Dubois eventually said "Fuck some America" and moved away never to return.

Appealing to reason. You know, and this is just my personal philosophy, if we could appeal to reason, frankly we'd never have to. It's like anti-racists declaring "I AM ANTI RACIST!" then they usually do/say something racist. Or saying "sorry" even. If you were, you just wouldn't have to now would you?

Or better yet, as I vaguely got into last week, trying to avoid things that are too conflicty for tastes. Like avoiding the issue of homosexuality because it polarizes too many people. Or matters of church & state. Or racism. If we just ignore then because we can't figure out how to solve them, tell me, is that really being reasonable or just doggedly denialistic? Yeah I said denialistic.

If humans had any reasoning to appeal to, why, just think of it. No more separation of the sexes & races (races, which, don't even actually exist). No more wars. Hell, I think we'd all be at the very least agnostic if that were the case. So think on that. Appealing to reason. If Dubois had been a little less idealistic, he'd have probably realized that slavery & oppression of blacks wouldn't exist if folks had some decent reasoning power. [Ed: I was clearly feeling misanthropic when I wrote this, damn I'm a bitter one.]

Then, you know, he got older and like I said, essentially got tired of being black in America and moved to somewhere in Europe or Africa I believe. As we get older I do think there is a bit of drive towards the schools of cynicism and skepticism. You almost have to, I think, unless you're so stuck in your world view and you just aren't evolving at all, which is bad.

And I'm not talking about "omg I hate the world *starbucks coffee*" modern cynicism, I mean real ass Greek definition. Yeah, different ain't it?

I will say I believe that. I do. I try not to follow too much of a defeatist attitude but I think as we do get older, get away from friends and parents and other influences, as we find ourselves we do grow more towards cynicism. And no I don't mean cynical as in the "i hate everyone" actually that's apathy sense.

Since I'm not feeling nearly as spiteful today I do think it's good to appeal to reason. Sometimes. That just can't be the basis of your struggle because...well, yeah, if we could just appeal to human reasoning you think we'd have nearly the shit that we weigh ourselves down with? It's sad. Folks don't learn. There has to be conflict. I say, and I think I'm quoting someone indirectly but I can't find it, to my friends & other sometimes that people CAN indeed change, but only with time and much force. MUCH force. You have to literally snap the wool from over their eyes and make them SEE, damnit. Not "the light", just anything. That makes me sad but unfortunately it just seems to be a fact of life. It's not that people are slow witted, just slow to change. Evolution takes millions of years for a reason I guess. Silly people.

Hah, I guess what I'm saying is I have no faith because I haven't been given reason to hope. Not a whole lot anyway.

Hey, Tennessee, let's ban adoption for those heathen folk.

Oh goddamnit I hate my state. Why do we do these things? First it was the English Only Amendment (which didn't pass, obviously, so buleria bitches) and now we're ALSO wanting to ban adoption for unmarried couples. Yep, let's join the ranks of Florida and Kentucky and Arizona an'nem.

Check it out though, only unmarried couples are prevented adopting. I mean, do you realize how big a damn group that is? It obviously includes single folks, as in single straight men and women, gays, lesbians, transgender people...pretty much anyone who is not and cannot be married.

AND I DON'T GET THIS. I can almost see a hint of logic behind it if I try. But, so, let's prevent more and more kids from having a decent home because we're only allowing married couples to adopt. Sorry if you're single and you can afford to adopt a child that needs you, married couples only.

Buhhhh?

That frankly makes no sense and we need to tell these...uh...people just that. Tennessee. YOU AREN'T HELPING YOURSELF. It's time to make some new friends and protest this ridiculous mess. Auuugghh.

Oh, here's a Facebook group to join, it has lots of good links and things :D

But...just in case you don't have a Facebook and/or don't feel like joining the group, here's some linkses if you're interested.

To call your local representative: http://www.capitol.tn.gov/legislators/

and call to Sen. Paul Stanley's office directly: http://www.capitol.tn.gov/senate/members/S31.html

[Ed: I fail at that link thing. Ooops.]

And heeere's what the bill actually says in case, for some reason, you didn't believe me! Let me know if that link doesn't work, someone, it's being kinda faulty for me (popping up then not popping up).

Now that I've said my peace, I'm getting my jotting hand ready! You think he'd be mad if I addressed him as...a...memb--okay you know whose name he has right? I'm horrible.

The Great AOL Brawl of Yesteryear

[Edit: Oh the typos. I shouldn't type while hungry.]


So, if anyone here still uses AOL (and I used to) please forgive me because I'm about to talk straight shit about these folks. For it occurred to me when I was younger and we still used the, uh, service, you know who else used it? A bunch of backwoods backward thinking head-up-ass anti-choice anti-gay racist assholes. Then, you know, just some other people.

I knew this through those little polls. You know, the "Should abortion be outlawed?" and then yes or no radio buttons, I'd click no, then pull up the results and see the bar overwhelmingly pulled for YES and, when they used to allow comments (I don't think they do anymore) it would be mass hysteria about how we're all sinners and going to hell and blah blah bliggity blah.

And I was about 12 or 13, I forget. It happened a lot on so called hot button issues, and after a few times I'd gathered up enough data to make the conclusion that my family was pretty much the only sane one using AOL.

11-14 were my horrible years: I was just turning atheist, realizing that it's okay if I don't like boys but it's NOT okay if I DO like girls, first period, bullied constantly, and going through my emolicious I Hate Everything phase. Everything just sucked sucked sucked and there are almost zero redeeming moments from those lost years.

Well, maybe one. The one day I realized that maybe I don't have to take shit from the world, even if it's just the internet. I got into an AOL brawl. I say brawl because it was a messy, drawn-out fight and I so wish I still had evidence of it, wish that I REMEMBERED more of it because if I recall, it was totally awesome. And a gay rights fight.

This is what I remember. I was just browsing around on the internet doing my thing, whatever it was I did back then, when I found myself doing one of those little polls. I think the question was along the lines of "is homosexuality a choice", I filled out "no" because I can read scientific evidence and it doesn't bother me, and of course the results were overwhelmingly "YES". Like ridiculously. Having nothing to do with my young life, I pulled up the comments/message board thingie and saw all these inflammatory topics declaring that yes homosexuality is a sin and they should be punished, it's wrong, we're wrong, how can you support that, eat babies, shit like that.



As I went through this hysteria...well, frankly I dunno what happened. I guess the internet made me brave for a while and I said, "I don't have to take this!" Well, not that cool since my awesomeness hadn't quite developed then. But next thing I knew I was responding to a comment with something antagonistic about Christians (I was still in the Superior Atheist stage of my atheism) being hypocrites and how homosexuality was fine.

And then, you know, I got virtually jumped by what I recall being more or less a bunch of truck drivers laughing at me and calling me naive. But surprisingly I held myself and, a little like the Lone Swordsman, I just batted at and battled the stupid. Which may subconsciously be part of the reason I still can't do internet debate without eventually blowing up at someone because the arguing was pretty intense. At this point I already knew I was at the very least bisexual--it was kinda obvious--and I was told by people that didn't even know me that naturally, my mother LOVED me but HATED my "sin". To me the concept of sin largely didn't exist anymore and I said this, and when it came out that I was agnostic, even more hell broke loose. Joy.

I had folks emailing me spam letters & bible versus, if I recall correctly--and just why--and I just laughed, figuring it'd sting to have their religion insulted so mightily by a child (they didn't necessarily know I was a child though, I don't guess). Don't think I didn't get any support though, it was actually more or less my first interaction with some form of LGBT community. I remember one out lesbian emailing me to thank me for my support and I was mighty touched.

But, because sane people don't use AOL I guess, the support was a little weaksauce and we were ridiculously overwhelmed, so we eventually had to withdraw. And after a couple of days the discussion just reached its inevitable conclusion and finally died (yeah this wasn't just a one day thing, I definitely remember that). I remember telling mom about it, at least in part, and she just shook her head. Eh, so what, I felt mighty happy about myself, at least for mocking the stupid.

And that's about it. I don't know why I'd forget about such a clearly awesome event, but I've pretty much buried nearly all memories from those years *shudder* huh, who knows what awesome things I've done that I'm not aware of now...

Would WEB DuBois condone throwing furniture?

Forgive me if this shows up like 20 times, me and ScribeFire are having a dire malfunction.

"I think he's disappointed I'm even in the class." Me to Danz via text message.

I've already told you my grievances with my American Literature II class. I don't think I expressed well enough I'm about to take down my professor.

Today we talked a little about Booker T Washington as he's the next piece we're about to read, specifically the Atlanta Compromise. I can give you all my feelings on Booker T Washington another time, but for now let's focus on this. Mind you, I got about 3 hours of sleep last night and we all know how fucked up I get with no sleep. I hear the voices louder and I'm more prone to so-called Freudian slips and paranoia. It's just how I work. Don't act like you don't want to kill people when you're sleepy.

Anyway, so we talk about Booker T and the infamous incident with Roosevelt. We then get into some of what made Booker T so remarkable and influential, that being his oratory skills. Professor starts talking about how important it is to have good oratory skills, remarking that this his how mostly how Obama got into the White House.

My ears prick but I'm busy trying to take notes and not yawn so loudly. Then...well...the inevitable Hitler comparison.

Yes, sir, that's how Hitler & Obama took power, their charisma and oratory magic. In one miraculous sentence my professor managed to link together an activist, a dictator, and a president. I mean, why not right.

Did I get outraged? Not really. I was more amused/bemused by the fact that he even went there. Strictly academically, I saw his point. In my mind though

WHAT THE FUCK

COULD HE NOT THINK OF ANYONE ELSE WITH BETTER ORATORY SKILLS THAT HITLER

OH WELL AT LEAST IT WASN'T MUSSOLINI, OBAMA'S BACK TO BEING A NAZI

Aren't we all tired of the Obama's Just Like Hitler meme? Furthermore, I want to know why, when anyone is mentioned as being a good speaker, Adolph Hitler just HAS to come up. Okay, the man had the charisma to sway an entire nation (or just about all of it at the very least). You know what Hitler also was? A psychopath & a mass murderer. Goddamnit.

Also pissing me off was my professor's seemingly lax grip of black history in total. Sure, he's a lit teacher, you'd argue that he doesn't need to know history extensively, except that's wrong because if you're going to teach AMERICAN LITERATURE you might want to edumacate y'self on some black folk writings, I don't care what part of the course you're teaching. You hear me future teachers and professors?! What is history but literature, and literature is history? Please know your shit before walking across the threshold of that room.

Lastly...this may just be me but I swear whenever I say something in class--and I'm usually pretty relevant, I don't say anything unless I think it is on topic--his responses to me feel so...condescending. That other shit is real but this may just be a psychological side effect of the fact that I was already annoyed, and then was blindly pissed when I left the class.

So other than blatantly displaying my mirth, I didn't do anything other than fantasizing hitting him with a chair. After the whole Obama = Hitler thing I rather did tune him out and just made notes all over my book. Really, professor, fuck you. We're talking about Dubois next and I suggest he gets that shit right, or I may have to beat him with a chair in the name of militancy.

"What the fuck," you say numbly. "Hitting him with a desk?! Isn't that a little EXTREME?"

And yes, yes it is, but it's been proven throughout history time and time again that people just do not learn unless something is drastic enough, and I figure hitting him with a desk is pretty drastic. Put that fucking phone down.

Run, don't walk, to the Tell It WOC Speak blog carnvial

Shit, I knew there was something I forgot to shamelessly advertise today.

If, at some point, you've ever thought for a moment that you love me, or at the very least don't hate me a lot, I implore you to drop by and stay a while at Tell It WOC Speak. Created by Renee of Womanist Musings it's a blog carnival featuring writing by women of color and allies.

To better explain, the opening paragraph why not:

Welcome everyone to what I hope will be the first of many blog carnivals dedicated to the voices of women of colour and our allies. In every sphere of life women of colour are marginalized and exploited. Often, when we attempt to engage to change our circumstances we are silenced.

This carnival is our attempt to give voice to our shared issues. We have a strong history of activism and organizing and it is in this vein that we have chosen this space to highlight the various ways we have attempted to carve out a niche in the online world. We shall not be silenced, and our dreams shall be realized. We are women of quality and worth.

I'm so ridiculously happy that this came about and all the topics covered & authors covering them are looking excellent. So let us run, not walk and go get ourselves some of that elusive awareness.

CVS says no condoms for you

While I was trying to un-depress myself I came across this article on the Curvature blog.

CVS Limits Condom Access for Some

Another CVS practice that disproportionally affects communities of color is the chain’s lockup of condoms. Condoms are one of the best defenses against unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases such as HIV/AIDS, but CVS makes it difficult for people of color to obtain them. At hundreds of stores across the country in areas where people of color predominate, CVS displays condoms in locked cabinets that require customers to summon CVS staff to unlock them and then monitors customers while making their selections. CVS is less likely to lock up condoms in areas with fewer residents of color, and the chain’s two main competitors do not lock up condoms.

Now, a little background for me, you guys know I come from Nashville. Nashville on a whole, I think, doesn't really have that many CVS stores. We have Walgreen's stores galore though. For the longest time I had no idea what the hell a CVS was until we passed one in a, let's say more upper-middle class area when I was little, and to this day I've only been in a CVS a handful of times. Walgreen's is my shit by the way.

So not particularly caring about CVS, in my time around the blogosphere I've been learning that, apparently, CVS has a problem with us colored folk, or at the least poor communities. I grew up in a poor, working class community, or better yet "The Hood", so apparently this explains why I'd never seen a CVS store until I was like...damn near 15. That and the Walgreen's stores kind of make it obsolete.

Again I say, not giving a fuck bout some CVS, I had no idea it was like that. But while reading Cara's analysis on this policy of locking up condoms, it got me thinking--it set off a couple of memories of home, and y'all know I'm suddenly homesick, so bear with me, I will have a point.

Like I said, we have a Walgreen's mafia. The closest Walgreen's to my house locked up their condoms--but they also locked up cough syrup & cold medicine and allergy medicine due to the meth epidemic. I remember once commenting to my mom about how shameful it was that we had to lock up condoms because someone would steal them. This particular Walgreen's literally got robbed every weekend so it was a surprise that they just didn't lock everything in the joint behind glass. But what was also odd was--or at least now after I read this information--was that this was a black community, but it was a fairly middle class area. The gas station never got robbed and I thought that was weird, but that's actually neither here nor there.

So, that Walgreen's locked up condoms & birth control. I said I could understand the cold medicine shit, sad as it was, but the condoms? Again though, keep in mind that Walgreen's got robbed an awful lot (it still does, poor guys).

A few of the Walgreen's in our area locked up condoms & birth control for what I always assumed to be security purposes, even in the more ritzy areas. The areas you would expect the Walgreen's employees to rob, not the other way around. I found it really sad that we had to lock up the Trojans from what we assumed to be randy teens that were too embarrassed/cheap/young to buy some damn Durex.

But the CVS. The nearest CVS to us was in a very upscale neighborhood, and while they did lock up the allergy medicine, the cold medicine and, hold on, condoms were on full view for folks to buy. I remember this because I was mostly bemused and sick. And now that I'm in college, you go in the convenience store in the Culp and the condoms are next to the fucking cough drops. It is university and at least they're promoting safe sex which is great. But as I've bemoaned constantly, I'm also in the whitest of the whitey white areas of the state, good ol' Appalachia.

So what am I getting at with this series of loosely connected stories? I already said I hadn't been in many CVS stores, so I can't comment on their policies really. Is there really some vast conspiracy against poor and/or black communities having to do with condoms? I think it's kind of interesting, and on that Curvature post in the comments there was a semi-discussion on whether this was classist or racist, with the consensus seeming to be that it's both. I agree with this even with my limited experience and I think it's a really interesting topic to go into.

Personally, my feelings on this supposed epidemic of condom theft is, at least in my neighborhood it isn't working. We still had really young girls getting pregnant and catching STDs at a scary rate. I say young folks because for some reason condom thefts are usually blamed on the young, probably with good reason. There seemed to be an awful lot of "condom breakage" too, suggesting to me that if indeed kids are out robbing stores of condoms, they still don't know how to use them (or didn't bother to use them, which ever). It all just goes back to crappy abstinence only sex-ed, really. Make your own damn problems, look at the consequences. Again I say, people wonder why shit happens.

What's so wrong with anger?

Y'all know I have a BA in Dylanology, but before that I had my Master's in Rush. The song I'm pulling lyrics from for this post is called "Stick it Out" from their '93 album Counterparts. As I go along you'll see why I used this particularly "angry" song over the countless millions of 'em.

So let's talk about anger. Or rather, I want someone to tell me when "anger" became a bad thing for MINORITIES.

Trust to your instincts
If it's safely restrained
Lightning reactions
Must be carefully trained

I don't get it. When I say "minority" for the purposes of this post we're talking men and women of color for right now. If that term bothers you any I apologize.

I've never understood why minorities of any sort can't be angry though. We're labeled with "angry black" or "that damn angry woman" or "angry asians". It's supposed to silence us, somehow, but the irony is that the silencing makes us even angrier. This isn't exactly new ground but it still kills me when I see in internet debates or real life conversation, it's usually some white person pulling back from a minority like "Oh my gosh why are you so angry?"

I've always thought it's pretty obvious to anyone who's not fucking clueless. I mean, you've been in history class and learned about what us silly minorities have suffered under the hands of Them In Power, right? So we're not supposed to be mad. We're supposed to suck it up and be polite, respectable negroes, asians, women, whoever. This is how people listen to us to totally disregard us later. If we politely write letters with our dainty white gloves on. Riiight.

Stick it out
Don't swallow the poison
Spit it out
Don't swallow your pride
Stick it out
Don't swallow your anger
Spit it out
Don't swallow the lies

So again I ask you, what's wrong with anger? We have every right to be angry but there will be folks that will tell you to calm down or watch your tone, like that matters when you're confronting patriarchy, discrimination, prejudice, what have you. Don't cuss, don't shout, it frightens us!

Honestly, if I'm not shouting, how do I get heard above the dull murmur of the masses? That's the part I don't get. We're supposed to be quiet and hide in the background, politely raise our hands like "excuse me? Can we have some equality?" Yeah, this gets nothing done.

I'll tell you about my anger. I consider myself pretty chill. On the other hand, I'm afraid I'm not very tolerant and blatant idiocy makes me kind of upset. I don't like to waste energy, so if I'm yelling at you about shit I probably have a good damn reason. You disregarding my argument because you did something to piss me off is really more telling of you that it is of me.

I have been called angry and pissed by white men many times. People that know I'm usually a calm individual (if a little bouncy) but the minute I call them on injustice and stop being their little dancing monkey suddenly I'm angry. I've been told to calm down. And sure, every so often I'll get so pissed I make insane typos because my hands are trembling. It's true, yes, I do get mad. And I don't really care. Why shouldn't I get mad? Why shouldn't I declare my anger? Hell, I don't even particularly care if you listen to me or not, the thing is, you've made this black chick pissed and she's telling you about it. If that makes you uncomfortable, deal with it. Think about what you said prior to me screaming at you to eat a bowl of dicks and don't do that again. Consider it a learning experience, fucker.

You might be too dizzy...to do the right thing

Anger is good. I'm telling you, anger is good. Sure, sometimes it causes us to make rash decisions like slash boyfriend's tires or set girlfriend's cat on fire. But I honestly believe that anger is good. It's healthy. If you never get angry at something you might be Richard Cory. It's fine for other folks to get mad, but minorities? No, we're either just whining or we need to get ourselves together. We can't be mad about injustice or anything, and for god's sake stop yelling, I can actually hear you!

You get so used to surrender

Man I get tired of people's bullshit. I tell you guys everyday (or everyday you read my blog, I'm more than likely pissed at something). I'm sure you do too. I am tired of being told I should just lie down and take what's coming to me and smile politely at it, or better yet, that I need to just pull myself up by my bootstraps and get over it. No one cares but me.

Who the fuck are you to tell me that, I want to know.

I care and me caring is all I care about. So I'm mad, you know what you should do? Listen to my grievances regardless. It's not that people don't whine, but this automatic dismissing of minority anger so you can plug your ears and go "Nananana, lalala!" has really got to stop. It's all sorts of immature and disrespectful, and yet it still goes on with the completely oblivious--and they wonder why shit happens. Well that's why shit happens. You don't listen to us, we make you listen. That, again I say, is how feelings get hurt and people get cussed out.

I'm angry by the way. Oh noes!

That Obligatory Black History Post

Why he's so mad for? Why he gotta have it?
Cause I slaved my whole life, now I'm the master

-Kanye West, "Swagger Like Us"

"Xands..." you ask fearfully, checking my pulse. "This title says 'black history post'. Why the hell are you quoting Kanye West?"

And you'd be right to be worried, but I swear I'm going to explain my sudden lapse of reasoning. I haven't been feeling very substantial this week but suddenly I'm reinvigorated!

As we know, February is Black History Month...I think I like the alternative, Black History Awareness Month. I like the "awareness" bit. It's one thing to just know history--but if you aren't aware and aren't able to apply it daily well then...

Every year without fail I get someone, usually white, perplexed and distressed out of their mind--perhaps even wringing their hands--asking me, "Oh Xands, why do blacks get a history month?! You'd all be offended if whites had a history month!"

EVERY

YEAR.

EVERY GODDAMN YEAR someone asks me that question, and it doesn't seem like simple explanations are ever enough. Try it, I'm serious. Next time someone asks you why there's a black history month, don't even give them an in depth answer. Just say something like, "Well because every other month is white history month." Do some sarcastic air quotes. They'll turn from "understanding" to "scoffing" real quick. Or maybe it's just my so-called friends. I think it might be the air quotes that get's em riled.

I find myself quite sensitive around February for that very same goddamn reason. You know, if you don't particularly care for the month, well don't do anything for it. It's not like MLK Day, Presidents Day, Labor Day...you still go about business as usual. Don't learn anything about black people in the world. Go about your usual day. It's not hard.

But do not, under any circumstances, ask me or your black friend and expect to get some miraculous in-depth answer that will explain the universe, damnit. You will get a simple one, and it will be so simple that it has clearly flown over your head.

I tried that "because it's white history month every other month" response a few times, and usually I'm called stupid or ignorant, first to my surprise and then to my extreme cynicism and lack of faith in anyone/anything. I come to expect it. What is it, ask a stupid question get a stupid answer? Yeah.

You gotta have a fever for somethin' good, come on y'all... Q-Tip, "Fever"

Alright then, enough grandstanding, why then? Why are blacks sooo special that we get our own month to learn about ourselves? As much as I get tired of repeating this shit, I will say it every month all year until it finally starts sinking in; until folks stop giving me that blank look about February when I say I'm heading up to the Culp center for a seminar on racism & hip hop (well, I'll probably never stop catching flak for that); until folks stop scratching their heads over Women's History, Hispanic Heritage Month, GLBT History month, and stop wondering why white folks don't get everything.

Right? Well. It's the way you treat us. Okay? See, that was easy. What do I mean? Well shit, it's no secret that history books are only just being rewritten to include more achievements by those of us not white straight males. Accurately. Blacks weren't slaves forever until the Civil War and then jump into the 60s. Women didn't just vanish until WWII then cue feminism. Chinese have been in the country forevers and evers. I mean really.

Oh but it's not just history books that are being re-written, every year literature anthologies get updated to include women, blacks, chinese, japanese, mexicans, native americans...art books, there was something between Eurocentric Renaissance art then, you know, cue Modernism, Post Modernism, Futurism.

You'll never understand why things are the way they are now without history. I assume most of us here would agree with that, but when it comes to learning about a certain group's history that fact seems to break down and it's all "Reeeally, a whole moonth? *weep*"

So that's really it. Black History Awareness, you either do it or you don't. You either get it or you don't. I'm at the point in my life where if someone asks me to explain this phenomenon one more time I might actually resort to physical violence (just sayin). But I'm recommending, if you've never done it, that you at least try to comprehend, and learn about black history be you black, white, native, anything in between.

As a side note, I didn't bother even going there with why BHA is in February, 28/9 days, the damn suckiest day of the year. Not even gonna go there... _{it does fail though.}

English Only Amendment... FIGHT!!

Well, first off you may notice that shit looks different. Again. I can't help it.

Anywho, the battle to pass the English Only amendment is really gaining ground this time around. Let me make a more coherent post about that other than dismissing it as being "silly"...well, it is but being silly doesn't stop something from getting passed. WE ALL KNOW THAT.

First off, I mentioned that this was proposed a few years ago, but was shot down by I think then Mayor Bill Purcell. New mayor Karl Dean also told the proposal to fuck off and has voted against it.

This is the week of early voting, actual voting is January 22.

I should also mention that this isn't for the whole state of Tennessee, it's just for the Nashville/Metro-Davidson County area. Which is actually a large area anyway.

So you may still be wondering what the big deal is. So you wanna pass an English only bill, big damn deal right? Well, no. I like sub-headings, let's do sub-headings.

I. What, exactly, happens if this bill passes?

That is actually the major question and that's what's important. From the information I've gathered, the proposal just wants to cut all that silly non-English communication provided by Metro govt. I'm assuming this means no more bilingual, trilingual, multilingual communication from Metro services. EVERYTHING will be in English. We're even holding up the hand to people who don't speak English. God forbid they want to do business with us or anything. But don't take my word for it (emphasis mine):

“English is the official language of the Metropolitan Government of Nashville and Davidson County, Tennessee. Official actions which bind or commit the government shall be taken only in the English language, and all official government communications and publications shall be in English. No person shall have a right to government services in any other language. All meetings of the Metro Council, Boards, and Commissions of the Metropolitan Government shall be conducted in English. The Metro Council may make specific exceptions to protect public health and safety. Nothing in this measure shall be interpreted to conflict with federal or state law.”

II. Okay, I see that bold part. What's your beef?

We live in an English speaking country anyway, theoretically you should already know English. In theory.

Getting aside from the fact that we all know damned good and well that not everyone in this country speaks English, be it well or at all, here's the worst thing about this wonderful "proposal".

The official language of Tennessee?

...IS FUCKING ENGLISH. It's already WRITTEN IN OUR DAMN CONSTITUTION! By now you should be thinking...

III. Okay. ...Wait, what?

That's right, the official language of TN is already English, and here we are trying to make the official language of a CITY...ENGLISH.

And that is exactly where this proposal fails to make any sense at all. How the hell are we trying to amend our Metro Charter so that English is the official language...and it already LEGALLY IS? They obviously either failed a few government classes or just want to save themselves the inconvenience of translating anything--but hold on, translating. Nevermind the fact that I don't think I've seen any of these so called bilingual translations that the city seems to not want to inconvenience itself with anyway. Walk around, everything here is pretty much English anyway unless it's an ethnic-owned place, then it's either in English or in X language, say Spanish. I've seen several car shops owned by Mexicans, their signs are in Spanish. They live in large Spanish neighborhoods, they usually serve Spanish people, many of them probably speak English well enough anyway. What is really the point here.

I don't know what the pro-English only side is arguing, and honestly I'd like to see it. So far I've only heard from the Belmont and Lipscomb crowds (that being all white, rich, privileged private college kids. I know, call me biased, I'm really not sorry). I just hope their argument isn't as damned embarrassing as this proposal.

IV. Alright, what do you think should be done?

I've said it before, but if the state really doesn't want to convenience itself with those wacky non-English speaking folk, then damnit do something about it. Provide more resources to teach them English, don't just look at them and go "I CAN'T UNDERSTAND YOU LALALALA"

That's not fair and that's just ignorant. The other thing would be...to...uh...not pass the bill. So many people are against this it isn't funny and is becoming more embarrassing still. I'm hoping it'll fail and die a quiet death for no one to ever propose it again. Seriously, this is stupid, I think it's stupid.

For me this isn't just a government issue but a people issue as well. How dare we turn away those that don't speak English well, not that we haven't been doing it forever and we're trying to do it still? You know what, in addition to making me pay for my classes by the HOUR (and I'm a full time goddamn student), TN can pretty much go to hell. YES I'm biased and I don't care!

If you're still interested, please try Compassion Politic's article, the analysis on this blog, and even the Anti-English Only Facebook group. This shit spreads way beyond "Hey let's make everything English!" when you realize what "everything" entails.

Uggggh. Boooo, Nashville.

Gay is the new black, haven't you heard?

Okay, I've been reading Renee of Womanist Musings and her great post here about the new cover of The Advocate. The cover declares that gay, it's the new black. I'm assuming by this they don't mean the color, as in "Hey, everyone's wearing it this winter!" but the people, as in Blacks.

The more I think about it the more this irritates the fuck out of me. As I don't say very often I identify as a queer female--or at the very least definitely unstraight--but I'm also black. Among a lot of things.

I just want to know what the fuck "the new black" is supposed to mean. How is gay suddenly the new black? After Prop 8 folks went from blaming the blacks (they constituted 70% of the Yes on Prop 8 vote but they don't even make up that much of the state of California...uhh?) to suddenly trying to appropriate "the struggle" as their own. Like, am I missing several steps here?

The cover declares the gay rights struggle as the last great civil rights struggle. Um, negative. As I see it the gay rights struggle is probably one of the more notable struggles of our times--well, I suppose I should say "currently" actually. But it ain't gonna be the last and I'm going to question "greatest". Because no one else is currently struggling for equal rights or anything. It may not be as profound as say, the 40s & 50s for women and blacks (and everyone else I suppose) right NOW, but that doesn't mean we've all just stopped and said "Equality at last!" and gone back home. The LGBT community isn't out there fighting the big fight.

That's just pretentious, and, I'm gonna say it, silly. I don't want to put down the movement--ever--but there's been some serious missteps going on since the Prop 8 decision. In a way I guess it's like watching someone get sucker-punched and stagger around a bit. You're a little dizzy and disoriented because you probably didn't see that coming. I can definitely understand that but this cover and its implications (and my interpretation) is just driving me up a wall right now.

I think I'm being a little or a lot harsh on this but this is getting on my damn nerves. I've seen some interpretations in defense of comparing the gay rights struggle to the black civil rights struggle, some neutral ones, and some against. I'm not really asking what to believe since I know where I fall. All I want to know, really, is how the hell "gay is the new black" and why no one thought that sentiment might be a little, I dunno, offensive. I am so serious, someone please explain this to me because I've been watching Discovery Military for the past couple of days and obviously not paying attention. If you don't mind that is.

Sigh.

Black. Image.

I wrote this Livejournal post as a reaction to a comment I got on a different post regarding "typical black society", whatever that is. After blinking bemusedly at the comment for a few minutes I just wrote a semi-antagonistic post. Why semi-antagonistic? Because for some reason my LJ friends list is mostly white and 100% comatose & unresponsive when I talk about things of substance to me. I just fuck with them because I can these days. And now you see why I blog *side eye*

Since I've got about a little less than an hour 'til my next class, I figure I'd address something fairly important to me, that being the so-called "black image".

What do you envision when you think black? Do you see a man or a woman? If it's a man do you see a shaved head, broad nose, thick lips, preferably blue-black skin, bulging, wide, jaundice-yellow eyes, white beater, saggy pants & exposed undergarments? Am I getting close?

If you picture a woman, do you see large breasts, thick hips, ass, jangly bracelets, skin tight clothes, boots with da fur, silky lace front weave (or maybe even it's natural, I dunno), thicker, shinier, juicier lips than the male and some sort of salacious glance? Am I getting closer still?

Are these people named something acceptable like Jessica or James, or is it something totally made up and incomprehensible like Chaundicia or Jaewon? Do you hear "Lollipop" blaring for no reason? Am I close yet? Do you see it?

Do you know what the "black image" is? Do you hear the girl talking loudly in incoherent Ebonics, is the guy muttering in a low voice about his Glock? Do you think these people can spell, read, or speak properly? Are they high school drop outs? Does the girl have 4 kids by 3 men, has the guy impregnated 12 women over the last year? Is the woman receiving child support, is the man giving child support? Yes? No? Are you seeing it now?

I'll bet what you don't think of is a clean cut young man or a respectable young woman, high school graduated, maybe college educated, decent job and decent lives. No, that is not the black image that we're familiar with. That is not the black image that the community puts out. Unfortunately among the recent generations what I described above is either reserved for white people alone or other races.

We like to perpetuate ourselves. For some reason blacks are routinely seen as stupid and unsophisticated, not worthy of society so I suppose we figure why not, let's be the way they think we are. And when we confirm the fears of the pearl clutchers & purse grabbers then we perpetuate it. I wonder if anyone fears the loss of the black image and the black identity like I do.

Activism! part 2

So yesterday I introduced you to part of a Facebook note I'd written entitled "It's not about YOU". I figured it would slip under since it was more of a rant than anything encouraging, but it drummed up some interesting responses anyway. And by interesting I mean "No longer friends with".

Juuust kidding.

Anyway, the beginning of the conversation starts like this:

Its most definetly the next great issue our country will face, and sadly marriage laws (as Im sure you know) are delegated to the states, so there's nothing any President can do about it. Damn. This is when we like centralized authority...But also I should like to note that I think New England is just trying to clear its' name from that whole Salem Affair.

That's from my friend PW who's pretty intelligent. For some reason I scoffed at that though, and said:

Even if the president could do anything he's already said he's against gay marriage.

"Next great issue" my ass. Gay marriage didn't just suddenly pop up...and as long as America decides to turn both eyes blind to the rights of others it's not going to go away.

Here's where the fun really begins, with that scoff oddly enough. My brother-in-arms Daniel jumps in and kinda derails and fucks up the duration of the dialogue, not intentionally:

well, the "against gay marriage thing" is not the same as "against giving gay couples equal rights"

You can hear the collective "Rrrriiiight."

Oh isn't it? Please explain to the class Daniel..., I say.

It kind of is the same thing. Marriage gives you legal rights. We are looking (we being me and the gays HAHAH) for legal documentation, not the right to walk down an isle, my other compadre BF says.

Daniel defends himself valiantly and...well, at least he was valiant.

no, i meant that Obama stated that he was against gay "marriage", but that is mainly because there isn't any such thing, as marriage is essentially strictly a religious thing, he does support civil unions, which would give gay couples the same rights as hetero

Okay--wait, what?

So the core of Daniel's argument--mind you he's still responding to my scoff more or less--is that civil unions are the same thing, legally, as marriages, except, as I point out a few times to him over AIM, THEY'RE NOT. Ideally, they would be but if civil unions were totally equal to marriage in every way except religious ceremony, then I don't think there would be such an uproar over "gay marriages" would you?

While Daniel and I are duking it out, Mr Matt chimes in with this enlightened view:

I've recently revised my possition on the whole gay marriage thing(like in the last few days), and i have to say I'm against the idea of govt forced acceptance of it. Before you blow my door down allow me to present why. Marriage IS, under every circumstance, a religous institution, and Thomas Jefferson said that church and state should be seperated. So if a church wants to marry gays, WOOHOO!!!! but if another church down the street doesn't wan to marry gays, then geuss what?.....yup thats right WOOHOO!!!! They have made a decision that was their's to make. I dont think it ignorant for a church to not let gays marry. but i do think it ignorant for the govt to force the churches to let gays marry.

Another collective "...Rrrrriiiiiiggghhhtt...." from the gallery.

He doesn't want the government to force gay marriages on the Church, which is good because the government can't do that anyway. WHAT THE FUCK?

Daniel collects himself and charges back in with one more point:

I think the issue here, the issue being both the greater issue and the issue of nobody understanding what the hell I'm saying, is the word "marriage"
The point is, we want homosexual couples to have the same rights as heterosexual couples, right? right, so FU to people upset at me for no reason. However this is to be achieved is immaterial at this point. We must do all we can.

Danz, sometimes unfortunately, is like me: he can't let shit go and likes to make really obtuse arguments, in that what he's saying makes sense it just has shit to do with anything. Yes, he really is still refuting my scoff and this conversation has gone on for HOURS at this point. DAMN!

Frankly, I think PW comes in and probably makes the best point about the struggle for gay marriage rights:

...Its not something I can identfiy with because lets just face it strait people will never truly understand. We can sympathize but we don't get it. Its gonna be hard. Don't think it will be easy. It will be so very hard. But we'll see.

So! I think that's probably one of the few...ambiguously successful dialogues I've ever had *blink* I've had them in the past and they're usually fine but I have no earthly idea where this one went to. It's kinda my fault for derailing it so hard with my cynical scoffing, I think I should have stayed out of this one. But I was really bored ;_;

Why Obama stays on my door

So, our door got vandalized.

I figure I'll tell this story and get it over with, and this will hopefully be my last Election Day post since the drama has officially died down (I think).

So my room mate P, the one I hate (yet have started to respect again), is an Obama supporter. In spite of the extreme prejudice & racism on this side of the state (I can't tell you the hateful things I've heard from some McCain supporters) she went with the really tan guy with the funny name.

If anyone recalls correctly, I, on the other hand, said I would not be voting in this election. Yes, yes, I know, the shame. There's actually two reasons now but I won't go into those because it detracts from the story. I was happy when Obama was elected, however, but there were only 3 people in my vastly Republican dorm hall to really celebrate with. And it just got WORSE when I checked Facebook, LJ, and everything else I'm on right now (bout fifty-levin sites).

"He's just going to get assassinated" and "Well now we're a Socialist country" and "God help our country" and "I'm moving to Canada" and all kinds of ignorant shit. It actually made me quite depressed but relieved at the same time to see these people and their true colors in all their hateful glory. As the days go on I think I'm more relieved than sad that I officially know who not to associate with anymore, not just my so-called Republican friends but just these generally myopic, hate-mongering, racist, idiotic fools I used to call "friends" *sigh* And now you see why I don't have any...

But indeed I celebrated with my room mate. I congratulated. And the next day in the paper there was a big, colorful picture on the front page of Obama in front of the flag (during a debate I think) and a large caption declaring, "OBAMA WINS". Me and my room mate, knowing the residents of our hall, smirked at each other and I grabbed a pair of scissors, borrowed some tape, and voila, Barack Obama was part of the newspaper-flower collage on our door. Smack dab in the middle, the title taped separately from the photo.

Well, we both took a bet on how long it would be before some disgruntled soul came by and got mad, and we agreed on 5 hours. Oh, but the young ladies/men here proved us wrong and I bet you it wasn't an hour or two later before we discovered the picture missing but the caption still up. It was ripped up in the lobby before the elevator. We looked at each other and LAUGHED at the sheer ignorance.

We didn't cry foul or racism or anything, we just laughed because we knew it would happen. So I slapped on some post-it notes on the ends of the caption and declared these misguided ones "Ignorant fuckwits" followed by "LOL!" Yeah, it's juvenile but...come on, you take the picture but not the caption? That's like moving the headstones but not the bodies /Poltergeist.

So...I guess an hour or two later, guess what, the caption is gone, sticky notes and all. Oh, but we had reserves. We slapped up another photo I'd printed at the very top of the door (P is much taller than I) and I wrote in the blank space, again, "YOU IGNORANT FUCKWITS! LOL!" and reminded them that "Vandalism is bad you gaiz". And you know what? It's still there! Hmmm.

It's going to stay there and I don't care how many times it gets ripped off, we'll just keep putting up new pictures if we have to. I think the drama really is over, but no one bothered their McCain/Palin posters and pictures depicting Obama as the devil. Why do they get to fuck with our door? No, now is not the time to stand for that. We'll exercise our freedom of speech just as they do, over and over. The election is over and America/the electoral college disagreed with you, is tearing up a photo all your mean little heart can do? I laugh at the superior intellect /Star Trek

Questions for those who voted Yes on Prop 8

And...it so happens to be my 200th post! Yaaay! *noise makers & party hats...but no cake* Sorry there's no cake you gaiz :/

I'd say that I know *I* I don't have any friends that voted Yes on Prop 8, but I also said I didn't associate with ignorant folk. But I do, as it turns out. A lot of 'em. A LOT OF THEM.

I saw this post on the Friendly Atheist and figured it was worth spreading.



It wasn’t just Christians who voted to ban gay marriage in California, but no doubt the measure would’ve failed without their support. Ditto to the Mormons.

There are so many questions I want to ask those people who voted in favor of Proposition 8 and as a result banned gay marriages in California:

* How is your marriage any more secure now that homosexual marriages in your state are broken?

* What do you say to the children of gay parents who question why their mommies or daddies can’t be married?

* Can I vote on the legality of your marriage?

* How does this vote change your life?

* Are you proud of yourself?

* What did you say to your gay friends (if you have any) when you saw them post-election?

* Will your actions bring gay people closer to Christ?

* When gay marriage is finally legalized (it won’t be long), are you going to lie and tell your children your church led the charge for equal rights or will you tell them the truth and say you were the reason for the delay?

* How do you defend your position to your children?

* Are you in favor of lifelong commitments between two people or against it?

* What effect do you think this gay marriage ban will have on gay people? Young people? Non-Christians? Young Christians?

* Is this what Jesus would do?

Also, on the second floor (aka the Boys' Floor) there's a big sign declaring the resident(s) of that room is/are not racist because they voted for McCain they looked at the issues yadda yadda yadda. I wonder who made them feel so compelled to state that...if anyone did. I bet no one asked them. Real anti-racists don't need to explain themselves you guys!

Anti-porn bill passed in Indonesia

Check this:

Indonesia passes anti-porn bill

Indonesia's parliament has passed an anti-pornography law despite furious opposition to it.

Islamic parties said the law was needed to protect women and children against exploitation and to curb increasing immorality in Indonesian society.

Sounds like the morality police are at it again. I have to admit, noble their intentions might be, lack of pornography isn't going to stop people from abusing/exploiting women and children, or anyone for that matter.

What really concerned me was this:

"The law would ban images, gestures or talk deemed to be pornographic.

...

Violators face up to 12 years in prison and hefty fines."

Goodness. I understand that Indonesia isn't a very rich nation at all, and 12 years for having porn is just crazy-talk. Speaking of talk, I'm not sure what pornographic gestures or talk would be...and I wonder if the bill guys are either.

Man, Indonesia is a different thing entirely. There was the story of this one Australia woman that was supposedly about to face 10-20 years (something like that) in prison there for possession of weed. Weed! Obviously I don't have the story on my hand right now and I have a reaaal serious headache right now so forgive me, I'll see if I can link later.

But anyway, the bill hasn't been signed yet but when it does, wow. I tell you there's just no point in policing morality, you just can't do it, no matter how big or how small your country is.