Tennessee makes me sadder still

Note: Oh. Hey. Sup? Me? Ehh, fecking pissed still.


Not even a mint chocolate coffee drink could combat my extreme sadness upon reading more fucking dumbness from my state. I mean, TN already makes me incredibly sad as you may know from hearing me talk about it for more than five minutes, and...you know Johnson City is awfully close to like 3 other states I could just run off to.

But things don't change.

Oh, the fucking dumbness from my state:

ACLU wants schools to unblock access to gay Web sites

Knox County's school system is among 107 in Tennessee targeted by the American Civil Liberties Union in a campaign to lift blocks to student access to nonsexual Web sites with information about "lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender issues."

In a letter to officials of the school systems and the Tennessee Schools Cooperative, the ACLU says it will file lawsuits if the school systems do not develop, by April 29, a plan to unblock the "LGBT" filtering category "or any other category that blocks nonsexual Web sites advocating the fair treatment of LGBT people by the beginning of the 2009-2010 school year."

"Students at Knox County and Metro Nashville schools are being denied access to content that is protected speech under the First Amendment as well as the Tennessee state Constitution," said Tricia Herzfeld, staff attorney with the ACLU of Tennessee. "This kind of censorship does nothing but hurt students, whether they're being harassed at school and want to know about their legal rights or are just trying to finish an assignment for a class."

I suppose that falls more under "fucking baffling" than actually fucking dumb. Knox is in east TN in case you were wondering. Like Knoxville get it? Where you hear banjos and shit.

Oh I'm not surprised. I'm more mad at really over zealous school web censoring in general, blocking all sorts of informational sites. By my senior year I could barely use fucking Google in the library. I guess, I was in the library so why don't I look up some books, but I fucking hate high school libraries because they're usually so woefully understocked and disorganized (I fucking worked in ours, I know this shit).

Oh, but I guess that wasn't ignorant enough for you. Never fear, I have more fucking dumbness from my state. If this doesn't have you craving cyanide cookies and bleach tea I don't know what will:


Slavery proposal faces GOP opposition in Tennessee

NASHVILLE - A proposal for the Tennessee General Assembly to express regret for slavery and segregation laws faces a tough hurdle from Republican lawmakers in a House committee today.

Rep. Brenda Gilmore, a Nashville Democrat and main sponsor of the resolution to express "profound regret for the enslavement and racial segregation of African-Americans," ran into hard opposition from several members of the State and Local Government Committee when she spoke before the panel last week.

Republican Rep. Eric Watson, a sheriff's lieutenant in Bradley County, asked Gilmore to expand the resolution to cover all groups that have engaged in enslaving people through history.

"Let's do this for everybody, not just for a certain group of people," he said. "I know you don't want to get accused of profiling, I don't either."

Watson said others were enslaved in the 1800s, too, including Spanish and Chinese people.

Gilmore said she wants to focus on blacks because they were the most predominant group subject to slavery in the South. Six other states - Alabama, New Jersey, Florida, Maryland, North Carolina and Virginia - have passed similar legislation.

Rep. Eric Swafford, a Pikeville Republican, also took issue with expressing regret specifically toward blacks.

"Once we start talking about an individual group of people, and that we should never forget what they have gone through - I don't think that promotes love and unity," he said. "I think that promotes division."

"THAT'S TOO CONFLICTY OMG OMG OMG GET IT AWAY"

Actually, fuck the both of you. I personally don't want an apology. You're not really sorry, either party.

Auuuughhh it buuuurrrns~ *sips mocha*

Your Transphobia Also Makes Me Sad

Don't make me cry.

Note: I'm awful mad today and, at random, will let off steam and use horrible words.

Alright, while I have a few minutes, let me clear up exactly why your transphobia brings me *SADNESS*

"But I'm not transphobic!" you cry out. Shut up, for right now you are.

So, I told you why your biphobia makes me sad. If you didn't read it or quite get the gist, it's because it's fucking dumb. It's fucking dumbness to deny that a group exists just because you don't think they do (even science isn't on your side, for once). Again, think about who also denies your existence and think on whether you really want to align yourself with the people that hate you.

Transphobia is also fucking dumb but for a few different reasons. It's bad enough having to validate yourself to cisgender "normal" (bleh!) folks but you have to do so to that group that you were supposed to be aligned with at first. Not only that but there are apparently people who will try to deny your womanhood or manhood because you weren't really born a woman or a man what with your vagina and testicles and what not. Never mind reconstructive surgery and how you FEEL and shit, you're not really _______.

See, the closest I get to this is I usually feel like the wrong gender. I don't think I'm a female. I'm not a very good female by most Western standards--I'm not very sensitive, I wear pants and or capris a lot, I don't like cleaning (unless I'm mad), I do like to cook but only for me, and I'm not very maternal. I do however suck at math so that's my only redeeming quality.

The thing is, gender is a social construct and the sooner people realize this the better. But where does that leave SEX, what you are actually born as before society fucks you up?

Well, as it turns out that's not so set in stone either. I'm pretty good with someone who feels that they are truly a female or are a male and want to live that way, reassignment surgery or not. I don't even care if you somehow end up changing your mind. It's not my place to tell you what you are or that you don't exist and your problems have nothing to do with me.

To see the G&L outcast bisexuals and trans people and other groups makes me rather weepy and depressed because it just shows a complete lack of empathy and awareness. They want the same rights you do, probably even more because if I see trans people get utterly shafted in terms of hate crime laws and what not I will punch a chipmunk (they're awful abundant on campus). It isn't right, I will go so far as to say that it's wrong.

Do you recall the Remembering Our Dead project? It's still up and it's not just relegated to one day a year. Remember the burst of trans women being murdered in Memphis? That shit happens a lot and it's fucking sad. Your fear of the unknown is fucking dumb. I'm sorry trans people don't fit your dumb ass gender binary but you should really get over it now.

I think I might have mentioned this a while ago but I wrote a (n unfinished) story involving drag queens and trans people. Just for fun. There was one character who was a trans performer going through a divorce and one person asked me how can he be straight when he's trans. I died a little because I realize that sexuality & gender exists on all planes and just because you're trans or a drag queen doesn't mean you have to automatically like the opposite of your sex *blink*

I know, it's so confusing and so hard. Damn those perverts wanting to wiggle into every aspect of society!

Oh yeah, Adhamh Roland, who is now my man crush, also does a song called Bathrooms, Boxes & Binary that you should seek out. I really appreciated hearing about it after reading this post of utter fucking dumbness. Which just goes to show that anyone can be transphobic at any time for any reason.

Trans people don't make you comfortable, sort of like your former nemesis bisexuals. And again, sort of like bisexuals, I don't think trans people have to make you comfortable or validate themselves to you, sort of like you don't have to validate yourself as society as a straight person, or to straight people and society again as a gay and/or lesbian.

Auuugh~

Thank you, I'll be here until the 17th.

Your Biphobia Makes Me Sad

You wouldn't want to see a little girl cry would you?

Edit: I'm blogging on pure rage, I say "fuck" and other variations a lot.

So, you know, I've engaged in biphobia before. Like my agnostic buddies I've called them flip-floppers. Mixed up individuals. MODERATES (oh noez). Which is strange coming from someone who's more or less bisexual with an affinity more to females. I cut it out eventually when I realized how fucking dumb it was (I used to do a lot of dumb things). That's pretty fucked up, but what's ALSO fucked up is denying that someone exists because you either don't think it can happen or you've never seen it happen.

Let's take it from the top with asexuals. Do you believe asexuality exists in humans? Of course you don't, everyone wants to get laid at some point, never mind the group of people who, calling themselves asexual, sort of disprove this. But you've never seen it in real life, and furthermore, SCIENCE, so it can't and doesn't exist, and FURTHERMORE you don't want those icky creatures tacked on to your "movement".

Let's keep going with...I dunno, polar bears. I've been to my fair share of zoos but damned if I've ever seen a real polar bear up close, despite Youtube and scientific evidence. I've never seen one up close therefore they don't exist.

He who does not feel me is not real to me therefore he doesn't exist

Let's see...what else. Pagans. I've never seen a real pagan that stayed pagan for very long, despite evidence to the contrary so they don't exist.

Okay, bisexuals. What IS it about bisexuality that confuses/disturbs people so badly? So someone's attracted to both sexes. You don't believe them? Guess what, they don't have to prove shit to you for your clarification.

This shit annoys me. It annoys me when straights say bisexuals don't exist, but it annoys me even more when the GL community pulls this shit. You know who else doesn't exist? Gays! We're horrific freaks of nature, fucked up by one or two genes that make us attracted to the same sex. Where are the benefits? We can't conceive babehs or marry each other. Why do we do this?!

...And here we go turning on bisexuals. We don't want those icky people attached to our movement because they're weird and unnatural! We're at war pick a side! /colbert

Reading this thread (and the link therein) a few days ago made me rather sad and really just gave me one more reason to be really annoyed with the GL community. Which is a pity because I used to like it until it started becoming apparent that I wasn't wanted there either.

You're uncomfortable with bisexuals. You don't think they're really real, like the invisible pink unicorn. But! you want equal rights and shit. You know who also wants to deny certain groups equal rights? Your opponents! They want to deny you rights and deny your existence! Do you see how fucking dumb that is? I'm not comfortable with people in jail but I don't think they should live in sub-human conditions, this coming from someone who has had two uncles murdered.

Sure, you've never seen one of those rare elusive bisexuals in real life or you're think they're all just faking. Lulz! Too bad we can't just shut off our sexuality and our personalities like Them O Mighty Privileged. I'd like the G&L community to get their shit together, again, and check back with us aft'while. I'm gonna be busy trying to advocate and shit and not fucking around with who and what I want tacked to "my side" or what I think or don't think exists.

Lulz, these get angrier and angrier.

Amazon, get thee to a corner and sitteth down

Well, I actually have no idea what to say on this other than:

1) Eh? Again?
2) Ah, gay hate
3) My closet is still stuck
4) Oh that amazon thing is really stupid

So I'll just direct everyone to these two posts and if you want a summary, well...

Looks like Amazon is stripping sales ranks from GLBT/Qetc books because they're adult in material. You may say, "Oh...so?" Well that means when you search for, say, Heather Has Two Mommies, you'll instead get books on healing your gayness. Not quite what you were looking for is it? See, we're talking ANY gay literature, not just the naughty stuff.

I dunno, I seem to remember similar incidents a year ago in which Amazon actually did censor actual erotic literature, which was also kinda fucking stupid, but I may have either imagined that or they've just fixed it. Anyway, the point is now someone either cried mama or Amazon's lost its collective mind and has decided no one needs to see those dirty gay books, BUT you can still probably get graphically illustrated Kama Sutra translations and stuff~ good logic there.

Edit: Well, Amazon does still seem to have a vendetta against erotic literature, but taking down NON-erotic works of gay literature in the process is just...um...what's the word...not...right? Yeah.

I feel like if I read any more on this I'll just launch a massive trolling campaign for the fuck of it so until I see further breaking news I'm just going to stare.

Edit: If you're that hooked on Amazon and wondering, "Well if I boycott the fuckers how will I finish reading Ranma 1/2?!" or some such, try IndieBound, the link to which I nabbed from Random Babble.

Oh and Powell's. For real, keep the fail coming Amazon. Can't stop won't stop til I get free clothes!

Stop Fucking with The Kids

Is the only way I can describe it.

Look, I don't like kids that much. I like babies even less. I can tolerate them now but thanks to some teething incidents I had when I was a kid, I just do not like kids. I have not since I was one myself. I like plants. When my maternal instinct kicks in, I buy a new one.

BUT

That doesn't mean I want to see them suffer. Kids that is.

I seem to be the only one who remembers I was a fucking child once, and the memory of my child hood is still very fresh in my mind.

When I tutor, I treat my kids as equals more or less. I do not speak down to them. I treat them like damn human beings and try to set an example for my peers to do the same. It's been proven that children are no where near as stupid as we, adults, would like to think they are.

They make mistakes. They're young. They need guidance, but they don't need to be screwed over. Let's take it from the top with the educational system.

This story pissed me off so badly I honestly could not see straight for a few minutes. This child was bullied daily, being taunted with anti-gay slurs even though he was 11 and even though he did not identify as gay. This child hanged himself over daily abuse despite his mother's pleas for the school to do something. If the school did, it proved woefully uneffective.

The thing is, this isn't the first child suicide over bullying we've heard about, is it. There have been FOUR this year according to the GLSEN article, middle school aged children. Fucking middle school when things are at such a critical stage. What are you, about 11-14 now for middle school I think. This child will never see his 12th birthday for being taunted by his peers over a perceived orientation. He was different and that's all the kids needed.

Bullying is a part of the school experience you may say, it builds character, teaches kids about the real world and what not and toughens them up. Alright, tell that to the young lives that have been snuffed out because their voices were ignored. Tough enough for you, now?

Children are cruel, but it's foolish to think that they come out of the womb screaming "fag!" and "dyke!" and "omg fatso!"

No, it's fucking us, man. Directly or indirectly, children learn from us. They learn from the outside. They. LEARN. Intolerance. You can have a personality but kids, I do not believe, are seldom born to be a bully. That's not it. That's passing off blame to shit we don't understand therefore absolving US of any guilt but fuck that, it's US.

I was bullied quite often as a child for being overweight and not the prettiest, and this seems to be commonplace in childhood. And I can only speak from my experience but my teachers seldom did anything about it. You could almost say they had just given up--because bullying occurs so often they figure kids will get over it. Well as we're finding out not all of them do.

And these are the same people who wonder why these kids are killing themselves because life is already too damn hard for them. You want to know why?

Check this out. A while ago, a month or so ago, there was a bill in TN that wanted to remove all teachings of any human sexuality outside of heterosexuality at ANY grade level. This would have effectively erased homosexuality from these kids' lives. I can't say if it actually got anywhere but I wouldn't doubt it since being afraid of TEH GAYNESS is what's in now.

Parents don't want their kids to learn about what is different. They teach the children, even if it's indirect, to mock what is different. So when someone doesn't act like you, look like you, you're bad. We don't want you. See where I'm going here?

I would go into how much I hate the images on TV with hyper-sexualized women, racism and other such bigotry but must I?

There's no guarantee that you'll just mysteriously get over a lifetime or torment, nor is there a guarantee that you'll just leave high school like "oh wow, all that shit I did? So lame. I'll be a good person from now on!" No. It doesn't always work like that. Hell I'd say rarely because I'm a misanthrope.

So, we teach the kids hate, they see hate, they hate, and...well, what DO we do about it, other than just assuming the kids will toughen up.

About that. Do none of these adults, these protectors & educators of our young, remember being kids? Or were their childhoods so idyllic that they can't possibly fathom the sort of abuse that goes on in schools? I digress...

What do we do? Stop fucking with the kids is what we should do. Stop not taking them seriously. Stop not believing them. Stop passing over cries for help. It's not that you're not doing all you can do with limited resources, money, and time, but think about what's at stake here. It's not your spare time & sanity, it's a child's fucking LIFE, man.

Let me get to the bottom real quick with the government and wrap this up--

Oh, about Wednesday night, I caught a special on HBO called Hard Times at Douglass, looking at the effects on the No Child Left Behind act on Frederick Douglass High in Baltimore. Yes, even the government is fucking with the kids for whatever reason (and the teachers let's not forget), because we know how well that improved education *coughitdidn'tcough* *coughitjustfuckedupthecurriculumand* *coughmadeithardercough* But the gubmint has been fucking with the kids for years, in all sorts of countries, what with child labor and insurance and what not. Yeeah, government doesn't seem to care bout the future much, go figure I guess.

No really though, stop fucking with the kids. I'm sure all your intentions are in the right place, and that's great! But you're fucking up and I'd like not to open my browser or look in my newspaper and hear about yet another child in danger or dead over things we should be getting our act together on, alright? Alright.

To gripe or not to gripe over American Lit (to my white friends)

Sup from subspace,

It seems I've been in a bit of a posting drain lately. Oh sure I still update daily with something random as hell, but the drafts are piling up and I've just been unmotivated as...I don't know WHAT.

Saturday I was so unmotivated I had to have someone go eat with me. It was sadness. More on that in a second.

As you good folks know, either via twitter or my posts (scroll a few months for the hate), I hate my AmLit class. I unabashedly sit in the very front row RIGHT IN FRONT of the man and threaten him with my eyes. I meanmug and side-eye at the risk of going crosseyed or permanently blind. He probably senses this as we rarely make eye contact anymore. I've totally disengaged from this shit not only because of our caucasian malecentric reading list (I've seen him purposefully skip over women and people of color, just cause) but because of his...well, is it privilege to just sort of assume that everyone in the class has a grandparent that grew up/owns a farm therefore we're all instilled with intricate agricultural knowledge? I kid you not. You know what, fine. Maybe I just hate him in general.

(Okay, granted my dad IS from the country side...but that's not a farm)

The professor rambles on and on and has developed a tendency to start injecting religion where there is none indicated. I can't even pinpoint anymore the issues I have with that class, and I decided a while ago to just stop complaining and read something else, since my grade is currently invincible in that class. I fully believe in the power of a library and my ability to just find random stuff to read. I can't just wait for diversity, I gotta go get it. That's a lesson in life for everyone!

Anyway, I've vaguely touched on this issue, mostly to white friends of mine, because it seems (unfortunately in a lot of cases) white friends are all I have in the moment. Woefully unaware white friends. I haven't dared mentioned my displeasure with the whitecentric list but, oh, last week it came out to a person I don't particularly like, and she giggled.

"Who are more people going to know, Robert Frost or WEB Dubois?" she said behind a glass. Not missing a beat I laughed in turn and said, "You should know both" and kept right on going. She faltered, I glared.

Huh. Well going back to Saturday, as I was leaving with my dining buddy we stopped upon another friend of ours working the info desk. As we were talking we got around to discussing our English classes, and I again brought up my displeasure with my AmLit reading list in addition to the fact that the teacher just sucks. When I exclaimed "WHITE DUDES!" and boring not too long after, yeah I got a bit of a look. Then one of the girls just went on to say some mildly racist/fatphobic junk later on in the conversation (don't worry, I called her out...what the fuck is speaking Asian?)

I'm beginning to wonder if even soft activism is just lost on the people I tend to associate with--again I guess because I'm their safe negro--and if I should just give up. You see, I have no choice but to live my skin color daily. It kind of follows me around and the bad things that go with my skin color? Also stalk me. I wish I could just shed it and hang it up on the door every night but sadly I can't. Things stick out to me when I see myself unreflected in my most favorite of subjects, let alone when I know damn well there's a good portion of our reading dedicated to people of color. I suppose I'm impatient. I guess we'll never get to it. I suppose I shouldn't care so much since I'm going to have to take Am Lit I next semester, and I should be lucky to get slave narratives.

So I go on and on. But I'm a little tired of bringing up the itty bitty and the biggie things that irritate ME so much only to have either laughter as a result or at the least a subtle "what's wrong with you? Why can't you be quiet? What are you talking about?!" in response.

Such is the life of people of color, we seem to be the only ones that understand that. And yeah, my phrasing is correct and you read me right.

Ehhh. As carefully as I try to pick my classes, it seems I'm benefiting more and more from just tuning out of them and learning things on my own, as it usually is. Sigh.

Catholics, rest of the world to Pope: "Shut the fuck up!"

Oh this just warms my heart. A tip of the hat to this entry on Pam's Houseblend.

In light of Papa Benedicto XVI's embarrassing, dangerous, and inane comments on condoms, and everything ELSE HE'S DONE since his...uh...ascension? it seems all sorts of folks are just crawling out the woodwork all angry-like.

First, France & Germany told the Elder Thing to STFU, now it seems the Shepard's own flock are about to join together in a rousing rendition of "Bring 'Em Out". Okay, maybe not, but that'd be hilarious.

Vatican Insiders declare Pope a "disaster"

The Holy See is struggling to contain international anger over the Pope's claim on his first official visit to Africa that Aids "cannot be overcome through the distribution of condoms, which even aggravates the problems".

The Pope's remarks about condoms, and a recent furore over his lifting of the 20-year excommunication of a British bishop who has questioned the Holocaust, has left him looking isolated and out of touch, prompting calls for a radical shake-up of the way the Holy See delivers its message.

The Pope is isolated and fails to adequately consult his advisers, said a Vatican source with 20 years' knowledge of the Holy See.

Another Vatican insider described Pope Benedict's four-year-old papacy as "a disaster", recalling the pontiff's previous inflammatory remarks on Islam and homosexuality.

"He's out of touch with the real world," the Italian insider said. "On the condom issue, for example, there are priests and bishops in Africa who accept that condoms are a key part of the fight against Aids, and yet the pope adheres to this very conservative line that they encourage promiscuity. The Vatican is far removed from the reality on the ground."

I think I can safely sum that up to "DO NOT WANT". I think this is my favorite piece from the whole thing (the link is mine for the good Papa):

The Holy See claimed that the Pope had no idea that British bishop Richard Williamson had denied the extent of the Holocaust, but critics have pointed out that a simple Google search would have uncovered the maverick's anti-Semitic views.

Yeeep. But don't worry, the Papa's foot soldiers aren't taking this unfair criticism from sensible Catholics lying down, oh no:

We learned this morning that "Vatican insiders" consider Benedict XVI "a disaster". It's true. They do think that. He's a disaster for them, and their determination to turn the Catholic Church into a touchy-feely forum in which uncomfortable teachings and traditions are "modernised" to impress non-Catholics. Until the Williamson affair, the media weren't sufficiently interested in attacking Benedict XVI to be useful. But now, after that own goal... YES!!!

Take the furore over condoms. I don't think the Pope should have strayed into the topic of condoms and Aids, but what he said didn't represent a hardening of the Church's line on this subject. Post-Williamson, however, the liberal media have slipped back into anti-papal default mode, which suits certain "Catholics" just fine.

I just love how it's always the Libruls fault in ANYTHING when shit goes down. And you thought it stopped at politics. Nope! Puppies get run over? Libruls. Your foot falls off? Libruls. Millions dying over seas? Libruls. Can't find the cool side of your pillow? Libruls. LIBRULS!!!111!!AUUGH!

*tissue* Okay. Okay. I'm done now. I think I might just start calling Papa the Rubberband Man, he's always in trouble man.

Sex Doll jackets

Still doing that thinky post...but I hate it when I get weak and browse D-Listed. I find shit like this:

Sex Doll jackets for the discerning...never mind.

I can't save you from that link. You'll just have to click it and join me in cleansing. But before you do, I want you to know that it's exactly what you think it is and probably worse than you can imagine. Those colors don't even freaking WORK let alone reducing women to bits and pieces (uh, nipple clasps is all I can say) for you to wear.

...Did you see those fucking colors? Eeeeuuugh.

To save this from descending into madness, can I say that I've always been creeped out by male & female sex dolls? I don't mind--care, really--if folks use them but I can't...I dunno, get my head around them. I guess it's the same reason I'm not fond of regular dolls except now it's on a whole different level...the...fakeness and disposableness I guess. When I saw my first RealDoll I was totally done for life yo.

Sigh. Today would be a good day to eat breakfast, non?

Dallas school encourages kids to engage in mortal kombat. Like...literally

Bring em out, bring em out!

While being nosy on Pharyngula I came across this comment and...well, the unsweetened tea flew out my nose.

Dallas school accused of staging fights

The Dallas school system was rocked by allegations Thursday that staff members at an inner-city high school made students settle their differences by fighting bare-knuckle brawls inside a steel cage.

The principal and other employees at South Oak Cliff High knew about the cage fights and allowed the practice to continue, according to a 2008 report by school system investigators.

"More than anything, I'm in shock and disbelief — shocked that this could ever occur and shocked that it would be condoned by a professional administrator," said Jerome Garza, a member of the Dallas school board.

Okay. First off...I'm not even going to front today--letting students just duke it in a semi-controlled environment? Not that bad of an idea. My high school was prone to so many gang fights and random outbreaks that we actually did unofficially propose something like that. Sometimes it just gets THAT serious. In our case, the plan was to offer to let the students fight in hopes that they'll chicken out--because in all but the most serious cases, yeah, if there was no crowd or no administrators nearby the fight would eventually just disintegrate.

NOW

THIS STORY

First off...a steel cage? What in the Vince MacMahon hell? Where did they even GET a steel cage? And why was it necessary? I'm going to need to know ALL of that, in that order.

Secondly, uh, something about this school was apparently already shady as hell so I'm really questioning their true motives behind the little steel cage set up--I'm still really needing to know where they got a steel goddamn cage and who approved this.

The allegations came to light during a grade-fixing investigation that eventually cost the high school its 2005 and 2006 state basketball titles. School officials were suspected of altering students' grades so that they could remain eligible to play for South Oak Cliff, a perennial basketball powerhouse in one of the poorer sections of the city.

Hmm...fixing grades for sports? And now we're holding steel fight cages (which apparently served as entertainment for the teachers too, wow) I want to follow this damn money trail because it is wild.

When you see me in the streets shawty you don't know me...

Lastly, okay, no parent in their right mind is going to say "steel cage fights for disruptive students? Cosign!" (or at least I don't think) but hiding this shit from the parents for so long is just all out wrong.

...wait, is there anything about this that's RIGHT? This school gets two thumbs down and a vehement BOO'ing for stupid ass antics and endangering students (yeah it took a while to bring that little fact up didn't it).

Pope tells Africa condoms are wrong?

Before reading this, please put any and all liquids away and close your windows.

Ready?

Alright then:

Because Benedict the 16th just blew my damn mind!

The pontiff, who preaches marital fidelity and abstinence, said the practise only increased the problem.

"A Christian can never remain silent," he said, after being greeted on arrival in Cameroon by President Paul Biya.

The Pope is also due to visit Angola on his week-long trip, where thousands are expected to attend open-air Masses.

Some 22 million people are infected with HIV in sub-Saharan Africa, according to UN figures for 2007.

This amounts to about two-thirds of the global total.

According to Vatican figures, the number of Catholics in Africa has been rising steadily in recent years.

Pope Benedict said on the eve of his trip that he wanted to wrap his arms around the entire continent, with "its painful wounds, its enormous potential and hopes".

HIV/Aids was, argued, "a tragedy that cannot be overcome by money alone, that cannot be overcome through the distribution of condoms, which can even increase the problem".

Comment: So...in the face of HIV/AIDS prevention...we shouldn't use...protection?

Ohhh....what?

Excellent solution sir. Just like life saving abortions being a more grievous crime that raping a 9 year old girl. Wooooow.

Favorite search terms

I'm clearly supposed to be asleep now, but before I go I'm going to fall in with the search terms meme *sigh* I'm looking at Google's Webmaster's Tools (which is actually pretty handy) and I'm totally baffled at the search terms that apparently bring up my blog.

Note: I will mention, to give you and myself hope, that most of these are from 2 or 3 months ago, on the bright side. Unfortunately, for some unfathomable reason most of these search terms WILL bring up my blog *really sad face* BUT on the other bright side, I'm usually pretty low on the list and these terms don't necessarily represent the TRAFFIC I get from these terms. They're just damn creepy.

So here's a Top 10 that had be absolutely boggled:

10. black boy addictions

I can only guess that this one popped up because I've mentioned the book Black Boy by Richard Wright, and my blog title. None of that excuses...anything.

9. she castrated him

Pretty sure I've actually used that phrase. Still strange. Must investigate further.

8. what is mastur debating

I want to know too, didn't find the answer.

7. wristporn

The great thing is, I've actually used that term, just NOT in the way the persons searching that would expect.

6. "why are women angry"

Dunno that one either.

5. naked black football players showering

I. Have. Never. Used. Any. Of. Those. Words. In. One. Post.

4. infant fuck blog

I KID YOU NOT.

3. lisp and missing teeth drug addict

See number 5 and add an extra hell no.

2. bdsm nipples nailed

Well. I like BDSM. I like nipples. Now where the nails come in, I'm not so sure about.

And number one...my favorite search term that apparently pulls up my blog, EVER, at this moment:

drum roll please.

*drum roll*

*rim shot solo*

1. "www all" kinds of "incest com"

Mmkay.

What?

We're thinking of the children alright: 9 year old raped, pregnant, excommunicated?

Coz that's how it works!

Well, in case you ain't know, there's this story making its way around the blogosphere. It goes a little something like this:

A 9-year-old girl who was carrying twins, and whose stepfather is suspected of raping her, underwent an abortion on Wednesday despite complaints from Brazil's Roman Catholic Church.

The stepfather has been jailed since last week, the police said. Abortion is illegal in Brazil, the country with the most Roman Catholics, but judges can make exceptions if the mother's life is in danger or the fetus has no chance of survival. Fatima Maia, director of the public university hospital where the abortion was performed, said the pregnancy, which was in its 15th week, posed a serious risk to the girl, who weighs 80 pounds. But Marcio Miranda, a lawyer for the Archdiocese of Olinda and Recife in northeastern Brazil, said the girl should have carried the twins to term and had a Caesarean section. "It's the law of God: Do not kill," he said in comments reported by the newspaper O Globo.

Even shorter, a 9 year old CHILD has an abortion because her stepfather raped her. She was carrying twins. Her body would not have been to handle the birth because she is so young and small. And the Roman Catholic church wants to...to...call her a murdering murderer. WITCH HUUUUNT!

No really, as if that weren't bad enough now the girl's family and the doctors that performed the abortion have been excommunicated. This is me drawing the "I give up" Xs on my eyes. Say. Fucking. What?

So, all I'm seeing is this: a little girl was raped & molested for YEARS by her stepfather, it seems that no one did much to help her, she gets pregnant with twins and has a life saving abortion. And that's pretty much all I care about, then here comes the church basically saying "eh, rape? But she killed a fetus! She killed two fetuses!"

Give me a goddamn break. Seriously? And what the fuck was a C-section going to do if she was too young to give vaginal birth? Ah, I get it, save the kids. As in, the babies, not the kid that got raped because she's unimportant right now. Oh yeah she can take care of them, she's nine (old enough to bleed you know). Oh wait, let's give them up for adoption, better option. Certainly. And leave this little girl with the knowledge that her church cared more about a fetus than her safety and her life. Never mind her body possibly not being able to carry the weight of twins, or the fact that we can't even be sure what her living conditions are like. What, were you going to take care of the kids?

_AUUUUUGHHH

Goddamn that's just unbelievable and frankly unacceptable. Unacceptable and unbelievable IN ANYONE'S GODDAMN UNIVERSE except the church I GUESS. That's pretty much all that needs to be said on that.

The Day I Was Unable to Do Oral

Or, There Goes My Last Chance at Straightness, Again.

Warning: TMI Alert & Rambling Awareness set for RED. Take the women, hide the children, run in circles, scream if you must.

So, I only bother putting that half-hearted "disclaimer" up just because this might get graphic. Shit, I've talked at length about sex, masturbation, made bestiality jokes about rabbits and cold twitchy noses (yeah try to sleep with that imagery). This might also being extremely hilarious and/or discomforting (read: awkwaaaaard) to folks that know me in real life so I'm giving you a fair chance.



Okay? Everyone gone? Alright let's talk dir-tay.

I do recall talking a bit about my first REAL relationship with a boy. I'm so not looking for those entries because that's not a particularly painful point at my life but I really do have to wonder just what I was doing. He was the first guy to show interest in me that I've ever shown a remote interest back. It's teenage dating y'all. How serious was I? You'll see in a minute.

I knew OF this guy as he'd gone to my middle school and he knew of me. It was the first day of a new school year and for some reason I talked to him in the stairwell. He was funny and found me funny (everyone does). That particular year was grievously stupid for me in terms of school years so it was nice to have someone who made me laugh, to ease the tension of dealing with punk ass teachers, whack ass principles, and jivin' motherfuckin' guidance counselors (who neither guided nor counseled).

So long story short, after a few initial mis-starts we started "dating". I put that in quotes because at a certain stage we were still just hanging out, more or less, now with the added benefit of making out and groping. Until he learned that I actually just lived down the street from him. Ohhh deeeear~

Understand that no matter how comfortable I am right now, I'm probably going to be figuring out where I lie on the sexual identity plane all my life. I can't. I've settled into being bisexual because it at least allows me to admit I like teh wimmens while the general assumption is that I like guys as well. And that's fine with me even if it's not particularly true. I just don't feel like I'm sexually attracted to guys. When I mentioned the fact that I had caught me a mans, my brother remarked that at least it wasn't a girl (and fuck him by the way). I felt, for a rushed few months, that this was a great chance for me to prove to my family that indeed I was not a freak of nature and perfectly capable of being "normal". Which, as it turned out, is WROOOONG.

This particular guy was a great ego boost since he made me feel wanted even if I felt dubious about his intentions the whole time, and turns out I was right anyway--that's actually a story for another day, and you will laugh hard at it. But the fact is, sure he just wanted to zoom zoom in the whatever--sex. It was a little unnerving but I have to admit I was kind of okay with it. Until I was expected to...

PERFORM.

It came up that maybe we should do this sex thing. No real pressure, I knew how to resist him and put him the fuck out of my house if need be. I'd like to consider myself well informed enough with sex, and at least he had the decency to have a condom on hand. And sure I was curious. But not on the first date homeboy.

So the first date went by and he had to evacuate my premises before I laid hurting on his ass. Second one too. About our 2.5 date (yes it was a half) the issue came up again and I near successfully pulled off a hand job. I felt great. I'd gotten a guy hard and almost made him orgasm! And penes (yeah I know the plural for penis, I'm a geek) feel funny! I say near successful because, no joke, my arm was hurting too much to fully bring him off. I still felt great though staring at his near-orgasm face. I rocked for about 5 minutes.

Later on in the course of our semi-date, I finally decided that maybe I wasn't quite ready for vaginal penetration. He was disappointed sure but naturally there are other ways to get off--like a boob job. Sadly, I have itty B-cups and I'm short so that didn't work out so well. Finally oral came up.

Now...get this. I can receive oral all day long and had nooo problem with that and I don't think I ever will. But me being expected to PERFORM made me realize that in order to make this equal--and I'm all for equality--I'd have to put a penis in my mouth.

Needless to say I was a bit...daunted. Uh, he was pretty large (thus my hand hurting). But after some debate I thought I'd give it the college try anyway and put my lips on it and...

...promptly gagged. What the fuck was that horrible salty taste?! AUUUGH!

I looked and realized my tongue had landed right on the so-called pre-cum aka Cowper's fluid aka God's Way of Telling Me To Repent. I wasn't expecting it to taste like 3 years of salt off someone's brow though. Ugh ugh ugh! I thought if I held my breath for a moment it'd take away the taste but auuuugh it didn't work. I didn't mind the taste of flesh so much as I did THAT. Auuugh! How do other girls (you know, THOSE girls I guess) and gay guys do it, I wondered in awe!

Apparently I did semi-good and much like the hand job couldn't quite bring him off (did I mention my mouth hurt?). He didn't much seem to mind providing oral for me though so it was all good. At least I tried!

It wasn't just the horrible "pearly fluids" that I hated though. It was...everything. The weight, the texture...the feeling of it sliding in and out and feeling like, of all things, a failure despite his insistence that I wasn't. We tried it a bunch of different ways--lying down, standing up, in the shower (hoping the water would take away that aauuuugh taste) and nothing seemed to work. It felt like my Baptist training was coming back and I was having a biblical freak out, even though I didn't mind his penis everywhere ELSE on me that much. I probably wouldn't have even minded it directly in my eye compared to sucking on it.

I was still disturbed, a little. A lot of times if I can envision myself doing something, I can do it fine--this works a lot with drawing and essay writing especially, but, a penis is neither a micron pen nor a pencil so no matter how much I saw myself enjoying giving him a blow job, in reality I just could not. I felt guilty! He could pleasure me just fine but I couldn't seem to return it and that was selfish of me wasn't it? What on earth was wrong with me?

So as it turns out, of course I'm not the only woman with this issue or even the only person. Some of us just can't tongue-lash our lovers like that. It might have even just been that particular penis, but in the end it came about that I just don't like to give oral. That relationship disintegrated anyway so maybe it's for the best that I couldn't so readily hand myself over to him completely. Perhaps one day I'll find that super special penis or even that awesome fountain of youth vagina, but for now it just makes a funny story.

I see you still don't quite get racism: New York Post edition

Yes, I'm going to talk about that stupid cartoon from the goddamned New York Post.

I wasn't. In many ways I frankly don't care, I much prefer to watch the ignorant eat themselves alive. It eventually happens and I've learned that it happens fairly quickly. True, it's good to call folks out on their ignorance but I believe that, a little like a very unstable atom (which I guess they are), idiocy just doesn't live long.

I'll say for this much like what I said for that infamous New Yorker (do I sense a pattern?) cover: sure it's satire. But that doesn't mean it isn't stupid & racist.

So let me say that I still see that folks don't quite get this racism thing, and referring to things as "satire" or veiling it under "oh you just didn't get the joke" is supposed to absolve you of any wrongdoing. Some folks do this an awful lot and these are usually the same people that wonder why shit happens, never thinking that "Uh, maybe I did that?"

Let me address two things while we're looking at this cover, and I'm going to make this real quick because there have been plenty other of good blog & news outlets that have covered this:

1) YES it can be taken as racist, I don't give a fuck about context
2) Even if you take away the racist elements, it's still a really bad and ignorant cartoon



Now, we've got that out of the way, point 1.

1) Yes, it can be taken as racist. And if you really, really claim that you don't see the racist elements here, frankly I don't believe you. It's not a secret that my people, BLACKS, have often been compared to monkeys, chimps, and apes and still are. Have you heard the phrase "porchmonkey"? Yes, it is a racist term referring to blacks and our typically wide nosed, large eyed, thick lipped appearance. Supposedly we look like apes and people still think that blacks are "unevolved" and are still stuck at the "ape" phase. The irony of this being that we ALL evolved/split off from apes but no one seems to care about evolution and shit.

Secondly, no, I don't care about the context. Really, I don't. I'm not ignoring it, I just don't care. The little speech balloon says something to the effect of (I'm not looking at it as I post) they'll have to get someone else to write the stimulus bill. And sure perhaps a *ahem* certain black president didn't write the stimulus bill. Just what do you think when you see that. I look at the White House and I don't see any black folks so--oh, wait, yeah I do. Sorry I forgot, like the cartoonist.

Oh, the context for the cartoon was something along the lines of a pet chimp slaying it's owner's family--and no you didn't make that connection because you hadn't heard the story before reading the cartoon, and that's where our problem lies.

And now point 2.

2) Okay, about that chimp that killed its whole human family. Why are we even making a joke about this and why does it relate to the stimulus package. That's it, seriously, explain to me.

Do you see where I'm going with this? The only thing stopping people from making the racist connections is the fact that they just don't want to, and we call this being woefully unaware. Also, why are we making a joke about a pet animal killing/injuring its family? Tell me, New York Post, I want to know.

Oh, they did issue a statement on it. And it was totally worthless. Even your employees hate you, NY Post. Good on ya!

Folks, you don't have to explain satire to make it effective. Satire doesn't even have to be funny. But when you have to go to such lengths to dig yourself out of a ditch, well, maybe you did something wrong? I dunno, I'm just gonna watch them eat em selves. I hope controversy is tasty.

Would WEB DuBois condone throwing furniture?

Forgive me if this shows up like 20 times, me and ScribeFire are having a dire malfunction.

"I think he's disappointed I'm even in the class." Me to Danz via text message.

I've already told you my grievances with my American Literature II class. I don't think I expressed well enough I'm about to take down my professor.

Today we talked a little about Booker T Washington as he's the next piece we're about to read, specifically the Atlanta Compromise. I can give you all my feelings on Booker T Washington another time, but for now let's focus on this. Mind you, I got about 3 hours of sleep last night and we all know how fucked up I get with no sleep. I hear the voices louder and I'm more prone to so-called Freudian slips and paranoia. It's just how I work. Don't act like you don't want to kill people when you're sleepy.

Anyway, so we talk about Booker T and the infamous incident with Roosevelt. We then get into some of what made Booker T so remarkable and influential, that being his oratory skills. Professor starts talking about how important it is to have good oratory skills, remarking that this his how mostly how Obama got into the White House.

My ears prick but I'm busy trying to take notes and not yawn so loudly. Then...well...the inevitable Hitler comparison.

Yes, sir, that's how Hitler & Obama took power, their charisma and oratory magic. In one miraculous sentence my professor managed to link together an activist, a dictator, and a president. I mean, why not right.

Did I get outraged? Not really. I was more amused/bemused by the fact that he even went there. Strictly academically, I saw his point. In my mind though

WHAT THE FUCK

COULD HE NOT THINK OF ANYONE ELSE WITH BETTER ORATORY SKILLS THAT HITLER

OH WELL AT LEAST IT WASN'T MUSSOLINI, OBAMA'S BACK TO BEING A NAZI

Aren't we all tired of the Obama's Just Like Hitler meme? Furthermore, I want to know why, when anyone is mentioned as being a good speaker, Adolph Hitler just HAS to come up. Okay, the man had the charisma to sway an entire nation (or just about all of it at the very least). You know what Hitler also was? A psychopath & a mass murderer. Goddamnit.

Also pissing me off was my professor's seemingly lax grip of black history in total. Sure, he's a lit teacher, you'd argue that he doesn't need to know history extensively, except that's wrong because if you're going to teach AMERICAN LITERATURE you might want to edumacate y'self on some black folk writings, I don't care what part of the course you're teaching. You hear me future teachers and professors?! What is history but literature, and literature is history? Please know your shit before walking across the threshold of that room.

Lastly...this may just be me but I swear whenever I say something in class--and I'm usually pretty relevant, I don't say anything unless I think it is on topic--his responses to me feel so...condescending. That other shit is real but this may just be a psychological side effect of the fact that I was already annoyed, and then was blindly pissed when I left the class.

So other than blatantly displaying my mirth, I didn't do anything other than fantasizing hitting him with a chair. After the whole Obama = Hitler thing I rather did tune him out and just made notes all over my book. Really, professor, fuck you. We're talking about Dubois next and I suggest he gets that shit right, or I may have to beat him with a chair in the name of militancy.

"What the fuck," you say numbly. "Hitting him with a desk?! Isn't that a little EXTREME?"

And yes, yes it is, but it's been proven throughout history time and time again that people just do not learn unless something is drastic enough, and I figure hitting him with a desk is pretty drastic. Put that fucking phone down.

We suspend our disbelief, and we are entertained

Yeah, I was in a pretty upbeat mood today. Then I checked out some of my favorite blogs and in the span of about 30 minutes I became extremely depressed again.

BUT

Good news. Not suicidally depressed anymore. I think it would be more beneficial to society if I took out OTHER FOLKS rather than myself.

Yes, as usual, the Internet has ruined a good thing. I don't feel like talking much about what set me off in particular because I'd be here all day mad at way too many people, I just want to say that I have no idea how people can remain so woefully ignorant on the internet. I should change that to willful ignorance because there's no reason that, if you don't understand something, that you can't go LOOK SHIT UP and get you some damn awareness. It's like folks don't even TRY anymore.

I don't think I'll ever understand this willful lack of awareness--let's call it ignorance. Then again I don't get human nature and I don't think anyone does either. So, fuck it, really, if people want to act like the world is their navel I'll treat them like the world is their navel, i.e like they're fucking stupid as hell. I kind of hate everyone & everything right now.

I don't feel very nice so obviously today is not the day for forgiveness, compassion, or anything foolish like that. Instead, have a Rush song. Listen to Mystic Rhythms like I have for the past two days to calm myself. Forgive Geddy's voice a bit, also not helping is Alex's (blonde dude) lack of mic volume so those harmonies sound...like un-harmonies.

So many things I think about
When I look far away
Things I know - things I wonder
Things I'd like to say
The more we think we know about
The greater the unknown
We suspend our disbelief
And we are not alone

Mystic rhythms - capture my thoughts
And carry them away
Mysteries of night
Escape the light of day
Mystic rhythms - under northern lights
Or the African Sun
Primitive things stir
The hearts of everyone

We sometimes catch a window
A glimpse of what's beyond
Was it just imagination
Stringing us along?
More things than are dreamed about
Unseen and unexplained
We suspend our disbelief
And we are entertained

Mystic rhythms - capture my thoughts
And carry them away
Nature seems to spin
A supernatural way
Mystic rhythms - under city lights
Or a canopy of stars
We feel the powers
And we wonder what they are
We feel the push and pull
Of restless rhythms from afar

PETA manages to get even more outrageous, world spins, news at 5.

Edit: Fixed this entry up and got rid of some problematic wording. Not sure if it's for better or for worse but it sounds less frothy-mouth-angry.

Well, while I'm waiting for my hair to dry (late shower), I figure I'd show some good will to my brother Danz and prove that I don't actually hate him (he makes it hard sometimes though).

I guess I pumped him up and he made this post talking about PETA's latest antics.

What did PETA do exactly? Oh just dress up like the KKK outside of the American Kennel Club. You know, dog breeders. Why? They feel the AKC is trying to create a "master race" of dogs and that's terrible.

First off...I'm not even going to get into how much I care about animal rights. I just want to get all up into how wrong and blatantly racist and stupid this is. Can I do that? Can I please say "fuck animal rights" for a few seconds and just talk about why we don't do this?

I. PETA, help thyselves.

Let's get some things straight. Yes animal breeding & cruelty to animals is wrong. The AKC isn't some happy go lucky club that just wants to show of their dogs, they are pretty shady.

You know what's also wrong and shady, though? PETA feeling that they have to get their point across using other hate groups. Hate groups. I do not think the AKC has ever burned crosses on people's yards because they so happen to be non-white/otherwise not horribly stuck in the dark ages.

PETA, you have a fucking problem here. You figure the best way to help animals is standing around in KKK robes & hoods handing out fliers, and you think this is the right thing to do. In reality, what you're doing is making other, dare I say, more reasonable folks very, very upset with you. Okay? Here's the thing: the KKK terrorized blacks, women, Jews, and anyone they deemed imperfect. AKC is breeding dogs. It's really kind of apples and oranges in terms of which is worse (hint: both are equally terrible) but that really, really takes a leap of faith to make that conclusion.

But you did and I kind of hate you for it. I think what I really hate the most is PETA is not fucking helping. Naturally they don't stand for every single vegetarian/vegan/those of us against animal cruelty, and I'm pretty sure the public at large knows this pretty well by now. Still, they aren't helping their own cause. They are NOT. They're being silly.

II. Also, ur doin it wrong

They even fail at being silly. As I said before this edit, I think PETA got the KKK mixed up with those dreaded Nazis. If we're talking about a master race I know that's typically what I think of. But no, PETA chose to go with the Ku Klux--not even the KKK's American counterpart even--and they chose the statement they were going to make. I don't think anyone looked at those robes and said "Oh the AKC is creating a master race, must boycott". They probably looked on in horror as the Klan was given free reign, strangely enough, outside the AKC. The Klan we most strongly identify in this country as racist, not engineering the perfect breed. WHY. Why KKK and not some other group, I wonder. They're both horrible and yet not the same, but in the end that is truly a moot point considering THEY FIGURED THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Shock tactics

Can I just say how tired I am of PETA's shock tactics as well? Unfortunately compared to some of their past hijinks this only narrowly takes the cake. God, PETA, as I keep saying all your good intentions get drowned in your persistence in being goddamned lunatics. Help the animals, by all means, but stop doing it this way.

As a last note I just want to get into the broader issue of folks deciding that it's okay to trivialize the experiences of others by making these comparisons. As Danz points out in his post, comparing what the AKC does to what the KKK did/does is insulting those hurt/killed by this group. Every time you make a meaningless comparison to Nazis and Hitler to illustrate your point you're doing no service to yourself or those hurt by Hitler. It's really weak and unoriginal, and it leads to being cussed out and feelings hurt.

Uuuugghhh too much stupid in one week...it's just Tuesday...

AmLit is keeping it real...real American

I'm about to set upon you all a great revelation!

I think I may hate my American Literature II class.

No...hate isn't the right word. I dread going to it. I get majorly bored sitting in the class listening to my teacher drone on (then the brief moments of silence when he asks a question and no one feels like answering).

Also, the reading? Extra, extra dry.

What's irritating me most though, is an extreme lack of diversity in the writing.

I was looking through my Norton anthology and in the beginning there's a lot of Native American works. Towards the end there's a lot too. I look at my syllabus and wonder why we're not covering these hymns, chants, and stories, as well as authors like Ambrose Bierce (whose Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge trumps Huck Finn so hard I can't stand it). I look at the syllabus and for the first time, a little numbly, I note the authors.

Mark Twain. Henry Adams. Henry James. Kate Chopin. Jack London. William Faulkner. John Steinbeck.

What did you notice about all those.

...

Yeah? Yeah. They're all white. I threw in Kate Chopin to fuck with you. Make no mistake that we do cover some black authors suck as Booker T Washington & Richard Wright and Ralph Ellison.

But actually, you know what, add those names to the list and take out Chopin's. NOW what do you see? That's right, all male. Seriously, the whole syllabus looks like that, and in reality we're not even covering that much literature. I know, it's the second part of the course, but please tell me there's a THIRD.

Now for the beginning of the anthologies there's actually a pretty good reason for that make up, being that for a long time most writers in America were wealthy white males. Then they were wealthy white females. Then they were just white folks. Then blacks, and all those other wonderful minorities. We know this, and I can understand that pretty well. Except this class goes from Civil War to past the 60s, so I'm a bit perplexed as to why there isn't an increasing diversity of writers in our set out little time line.

Like, really confused, because this anthology and my Heath anthology contain a great diversity of writers for us to pick and choose from. Hell-o, professor, 'sup? Is there something you want to...tell the class?

I actually don't think my class cares. Goodness knows I barely do, and if I were another plain-jane complacent person with more time on my hands, I don't think I would. I'm keeping these books, it's just one class, I'll read what the fuck I want as long as I get them grades.

STILL

It rather bothers the hell out of me that this class seems to be content just to study a really superficial, I think, sampling of American authors. This is kind of ironic because I originally wanted to take Euro Lit, which would have probably been mucho màs blanco. But since I'm here I might as well improve my condition I guess.

So why? The simple answer is that we only have four months in a MWF class to cover the span of American Literature, so *shrug* I suppose. Pick out all the important ones, which makes sense. Too bad we don't like simple answers though, right?

I'd also like to mention that this list, strictly in academic terms, is boring as hell. It may have to due with aforementioned lack of diversity, but seriously. WE CAN DO BETTER THAN THIS. I aim to ask the teacher about it one of these days, I just wish I'd realized this sooner.

And I suppose my laundry's done. You know how it goes, it all comes out in the wash.

Weed: The Root of All Evil...I guess.

I don't care about marijuana. I really don't.

I think it's a stupid drug. Other than medicinal purposes I don't really see the appeal in tokin' up with RayJay and Jaekwon and Chuck. Then again, I am a complete teetotaler and I grew up around the shit...and other drugs *shrug* So that's me.

That being said, I am so tired of these goddamn AboveTheInfluence commercials about pot. Guys. Seriously? Stop.

You hear that acoustic montage music, then you look over at your screen and see a little boy with cigarette burns in his arm...because his sister is smoking pot.

I fucking hate these commercials. They're about as stupid as the drug itself. Stop vilifying weed like it's the source of all evil. It's not. Furthermore, kids out there are doing more than just smoking a little grass. Ecstasy, coke, meth, acid...meth is the reason I can't by Nyquil over the counter anymore!

And you may say, well, coke is a little expensive for the average teen isn't it? Or hell, even the average adult. But that doesn't mean it can't be made available and that doesn't mean that kids don't do it and get hooked on it. It's not that pot isn't bad for you, I'm just tired of seeing these commercials making such a big deal of a little grass when there are other dangers at hand.

Also...these commercials just kind of suck. They're irritating. They're too artsy and vague and aren't going to deter anyone. I think we need to find a better, more honest & straightforward way of warning kids about the dangers of drugs & alcohol. Teens make bad decisions but they aren't utterly stupid. Seriously, don't let those test scores fool you, some of us gots a bit of common sense and can think for ourselves.

So...to sum up, I'm still sick and annoyed and these stupid drug commercials aren't helping. Is that it?

Hold on, she can still have babies, this is murder!

I'll admit, if I barely know shit about American politics I know next to nothing about Italian politics (other than they actually seem to have a lot of issues that very much mirror our own in a sort of Bizarro way). But there's this case I've been following about an Italian woman--Eluana Englaro--who's been in a coma for about 17 years after she was in a car accident. Now her family is trying to fight for her right to die peacefully as, according to her doctors, the coma is irreversible.

17 years in a vegetative state. 17 years watching your daughter lay there and show no signs of ever waking up again. The woman is, for all intents and purposes, dead. Keep that in mind because it's about to become key when you read what this article says:

Italy faces constitutional crisis over coma woman

The Italian government has been plunged into a constitutional crisis over the fate of a 38-year-old woman who has been in a coma for the past 17 years. Eluana Englaro was left in a vegetative state after a car crash in 1992. After a decade-long court battle, doctors reduced her nutrition on Friday in preparation for removing her feeding tubes, which her father claims would be in accordance with her wishes.

But in an extraordinary turn of events, the country's prime minister, Silvio Berlusconi, after consultation with the Vatican, has issued an emergency decree stating that food and water cannot be suspended for any patient depending upon them, reversing the earlier court ruling. On issuing the emergency decree, Berlusconi declared: "This is murder. I would be failing to rescue her. I'm not a Pontius Pilate."

Wait, hold on, I haven't gotten to the creepiest part yet:

Justifying his campaign to save Englaro's life, the prime minister added that, physically at least, she was "in the condition to have babies", a remark described by La Stampa newspaper as "shocking". Giorgio Napolitano, Italy's president, has refused to sign the decree, but if it is ratified by the Italian parliament doctors may be obliged to resume the feeding of Eluana early this week.

You are fucking kidding me.

This woman in a coma is able to have babies. Just what the fuck does that have to do with anything considering she's been in a COMA for 17 years? Signore, just what the fuck are you implying?

Everything is wrong with this. This is sick. First off, good job comparing yourself to Pontius Pilate--so I guess she's somehow your "Jesus"? Your Virgin Mary? Also, consulting the Vatican? They have no impact on this woman's life. Even if she were Catholic, dude, they have no bearing on her family's decision to let the Englaro die. It is not your right to come to her family and say they can't let their daughter have her dignity and die peacefully. You have no right to keep this woman hooked up in a hospital for, what, another 17 years? And for what? She isn't coming back, her family has realized this, and they are willing to let her go. I suggest Berlusconi does the same. Sir, it is not up to you, the decision had already been MADE.

A little more:

The case has deeply divided Italian society and raised concerns over the influence of the Vatican. Yesterday Pope Benedict indirectly referred to Englaro in a message delivered to mark the World Day of the Sick, stating that society had a duty to defend "the absolute and supreme dignity of every human being" even when "weak and shrouded in the mystery of suffering". But even some of Berlusconi's political allies, including the president of the lower house of parliament, Gianfranco Fini, have stated that the supreme court ruling should be obeyed and Englaro should be allowed to die.

Meanwhile, doctors are continuing to act according to the original supreme court ruling. On Friday morning in the La Quiete clinic in Udine, northern Italy, they began reducing the amount of food in Eluana Englaro's feeding tube, according to a precise medical protocol that will see nutrition gradually replaced with sedative and anti-convulsant medication. Experts say that within four to five days her condition may have deteriorated to an irreversible extent, though it might be two weeks or more before her heart stops. The process means the Englaro family and their doctors are now in a race against time as they try to end Eluana's life before the Berlusconi government and its backers in the Vatican halt the process.

This is just...sick. In a "race" to give this woman her final--or at least her family's final--wishes. It's true that people do come out of comas in months, years, decades...but this is what her family wants. They just want their daughter to go off peacefully. What is wrong with this? How is this a "crime against humanity" I ask you? Wouldn't it be more humane to end her suffering? Just because she can still have children--physically--but is not MENTALLY capable is that all that's required for life? That...is sick.