February 20, 2010

I'm (still) not your unicorn

Tumblr repost with some extra foot notes:

Okay.

Look, I get it, I’m possibly the only negro in Appalachia with an (unnaturally) multicolor afro. I get it. I don’t usually mind when people stare at me like “…. :O!” because I concede that it’s amazing and awe-inspiring.

But what I have NEVER been able to stand is TOUCHING MY HAIR. What the HALE?

I suppose my fro has been extra-fluffalicious lately because I’ve been messing around with twist outs more often, thus restoring my bouncy curls. But you know what? THEY’RE MY CURLS AIGHT?

I’m talking to my mom on the phone when suddenly someone pets my head. I’m like “excuse me mama *covers phone barely* WHAT THE FUCK?”

It’s a friend of mine. This friend is like…on a whitey scale of 1-10 she’s about 20.5, to be fair. She’s randomly stroked and petted my hair before. This makes me a little irate.

Earlier in the week one of my girls (that is, one of the girls I tutor on a regular basis) petted my hair too. Not just “oooooh *stare*” but just randomly ran her fingers through it. I’ve had people touch my hair & comment how thick it is (lulz try washing it) and I seriously have no idea how people miss how visibly uncomfortable I get when my hair is touched.


To catch you all up let me tell you a personal story. My hair has been unruly all my life and my family—my dad and his side especially—just like to…roughly pull and man handle my hair for some reason.

“GUUUUURL YO HAIR IS SO THICK! TIME FOR A PERM!”

Perms burnt my scalp over and over for many years (about 12 I think). My scalp is sensitive. I barely like to handle my hair myself. People grabbing it brings back flashbacks of feeling helpless because I couldn’t even own my hair, which grows from the top of MY head. And it adds an extra layer of creepy when mostly strange white folks ask me if they may caress my savage locks. WTF who DOES that?


So, people, touch my hair one more goddamn ‘gain like I’m your personal unicorn, just don’t be surprised if I karate chop & curb stomp your ass.

*I don't advocate violence. Not all the time.

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