September 9, 2009

Fabion (right) talks "Colored Folk" (riiiight)

Forgive me everyone, I hate to feed the real life trolls but I need to unwind today *rinses out tea cup*

Fabion Talks "Colored Folk"

It's always that one dude with the impossibly ghetto fabulous name. Yeah I said it.

Black Americans blindly vote democrat.

*sips tea* In some respects that true but in some it's also bullshit, considering the number of black republicans and dare I say, black independents. other words, we're not a monolith but you ARE clueless.

Ideologically speaking, black people are more Republican than they are Democrat, and I have noticed several aspects of black culture that confirm this.

What did I just say about a monolith? Also what definition of republican are we working with?

First, black Americans are emphatically religious.


Second, black culture is homophobic.


Lastly, black people believe in pulling yourself up by your bootstraps.


Haha get what he did there? These are all Republican traits!

...Actually, since Republican =/= conservative and these are all conservative traits, his opinion is kind of blown. I mean, aside from all these not being true but I'd argue that older generations of black folks probably are more conservative but that goes...pretty much for everyone it seems like? There's nothing to even break down there. Dan Savage is that you in there?

Also you love how he did the thesis statement & now the 5 paragraphs.

Religious zeal, homophobia, and self-reliance all sound like the ingredients for a GOP dinner party to me.

The power of the church in Black American culture is undeniable. Even the most hardbodied criminals, janky white collar criminals, and two-bit untrustworthy hustlers in the black community have a heavy presence of religion in their lives. I live in an all-black neighborhood, full of black well-to-do's and fake thugs.

So what you're saying is...the basis for every blaxploitation move ever.

My neighborhood has two entrances. At the Lumar entrance you have Ebenezer Baptist Church, and at the Kingsway entrance you have National Church of God; both churches are absolutely monstrous. Ebenezer is so large that the police shut down a street when church is starting and ending. The mention of atheism in a crowd of black Americans will draw glares and care bear stares. Even if no one in the group has attended church in the last year, the thought that someone could not believe in God in the black community is sacrilegious.

Okay. He's right. So?

I know my indictment might ruffle some feathers and anger some folk, but black culture is very homophobic. A level of homophobia that is rivaled only by neo-conservatives with hunger pangs of religious zeal. A couple years ago when Kanye West spoke out on homophobia, he almost had his head taken off. In November of 2008, exit polls showed that 70 percent of blacks polled supported Proposition 8.

Yeah because black folks are totally the majority in any state despite being a minority population in the country.

For those unaware, Proposition 8 was California's attempt at prohibiting same sex marriages. Ironically, I am willing to bet that those same black people voted for Barack Obama on that very day.

Lastly, black culture focuses on self-reliance and a "do it yourself" attitude. We can go back as far as the tales of slaves using ingenuity and guile to outsmart their captors in order to escape to Canada and the north via the Underground Railroad.

Mm...again, so?

We can then fast-forward to W.E.B. DuBois, who championed for black separatism and economic independence. I could go on ad nauseum with examples of black people supporting the "pulling yourself up by your bootstraps" philosophy, but I will spare you the brain drain.

You can spare all of us irreversible brain leakage by deleting this article.

I will, however, point you in the direction of any rapper who talks about being a "hustler". The lyrics in many hip-hop singles support hard-work, determination, and sheer grit as the ways of achieving success.

Lulz, wow you are all over the place. Now we're in mainstream rap for no reason which isn't even so much "look at mah bootstraps!" as it is "I made it"

Despite all the shared ideologies with the Republican Party, 96 percent of all black people in America voted for Barack Obama in the last election. Which begs the question, are we voting on policy stances or out of habit?

Wow, if I were a middle school teacher there would be a big ol' orange F all over this shit. First off it's horribly written and all over the place and secondly who is he talking to and what the fuck is he talking about? Thanks for feeding into old ass stereotypes, since you seem to be concerned, are you going to write more dumbass incomprehensible obscurantist (I love that word now) articles or do something in the community?

Hahaaa. I feel better. I'll be posting normal things again soon.

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