Kitties in my back yard

We interrupt your daily readings to bring you: kittens.

There are cats in my backyard. And I want them.

I WANT THEM ALL.

In my house.

There's about...4 that we've seen, a tortie, a tuxedo, an orange stripey one, and a jet black one. They look too-well kept to be strays so we figure someone is taking care of them, but I've seen some rather nice looking feral kitties too (omgomg). I think cats just...keep themselves pimp like that.

Anyway.

How to catch them. Should I catch them? Probably not, but I'm insane. I plan on decorating my dorm with chipmunks because ETSU has a massive population of them.

So, I try to trick them with food every now and then (the cats) but it seems they're on to my game so they don't come to eat until I leave. So...I'm thinking of literally fishing for them, with a stick & a string. Cats aren't stupid by any means but they can be distracted right?

I'd chase them but unlike chipmunks and pigeons, cats have a tendency to fight back with claws and shit.

I don't want to keep them as pets mind you, I just want a cat. And technically, I guess I have four now since no one lives next door to us anymore, where they reside (that's our "back yard"...yeah it's weird). I wonder if someone does own them, we've had an awful lot of stray animals about lately. We should totally get some of the animal shelter people down here, too bad the nearest one is like half an hour away. Damn these suburbs!