HARROWING REGISTRATION TALES

A little diversion for you all while I try to make smarty posts. This is how my day went.

Note: I use "bitch" a lot, more in reference to people that annoy me, not just women. Oh and copious blood.


So I hate undergarments when I sleep, usually, and the night before I chose to sleep in shorts and a purple t-shirt. That bit of info will become important later.

Friday, 10 AM. I wake up to the sound of someone typing on a keyboard, only to realize that I'm the only one in my room and it's actually just raining outside. Yay.

Figuring I wouldn't get to sleep anymore today, I wake up...and realize something important: I have to register for class at noon. Oh shit! Get on Gold Link and pull them classes up. I already had a fair idea of what I needed to take to get me credits & hours so I waste no time--

...except even as noon o'clock comes I still can't register. See, this has been happening for two days and no one has been able to tell me why. So I call the registrar again and they tell me that because I only have 18 earned hours (WTF?!) I have to go down to the advisement resource center and get cleared because of my developmental class. Keep in mind, I'd gotten cleared for those classes, oh, last month.

So wasting no time, at this point it's sunny outside but I grabbed my umbrella, put on some flip flops and left, angrily calling my mother & texting all the while. My period has started and I'm feeling squishy already, my back hurts and the last thing I want to do is walk up some damn stairs and shit.

I get to the Culp center and I ask the ladies at the ARC what the fuck I gotta do. They send me to the back. The girls in the back tell me to come back in an hour while one grabs my file--or so I think. Smoldering, I leave the office and go get me a paltry lunch and wait for these bitches to get it together. I walk to the 3rd floor to eat, then back down a ramp and decide I could sit in the library. It's a nice sunny, breezy day out but I'm having none of it as I'm desperately trying to keep blood from running down my legs and into my shoes. I don't really care, it's just that I have to pee every five minutes and that's a little annoying.

Exhausted, I wait in the coolness of the library, reclining in a soft chair and reading the Annotated Alice in Wonderland (need to check that out perhaps). It's easter so not a lot of people around for me to cuss out. About 1:30 I head back to the Culp and wait in the lobby a while longer, bleed on some seats, then bust back into the ARC center and head straight for the section I was at before, "undeclared" despite having a major.

Now here's where it gets fucked up. The lady I saw before--not one of the student workers--recognizes me and asks why I'm back, I say I still need to get advised. She's like "..." at me and goes to look for my file--I don't have one. Why? I'm developmental math only, so I need to go to my department (english) and see the folks there. Thing is, it's fucking 1:40 and I was supposed to have registered an hour and 40 minutes ago, I don't know who my adviser is this semester and with my aching lower back and cramping stomach THE LAST GODDAMN THING I WANT TO DO IS WALK 20 MINUTES TO BURLESON HALL WHEN YOU BITCHES JUST TOLD ME I COULD DO A WALK IN ADVISEMENT.

I didn't yell but I got testy as fuck, and eventually I met with an intern there who so happened to be in the English department as well, and she got me straightened out while I sat there in her nice comfy seat, probably bleeding on it all the while. Once all that drama was over, I texted and called in celebration and squishy-squished my bloody way back to my dorm room for a nap.

This is why I hate authority.