January 24, 2009

Dear Company

I have received your letter of termination and I must say I'm not surprised. You say my performance is spotty? Well your ranks are jumpy and inconsistent. I'm unreliable? Your love of outsourcing and travel leave me unable to cope with changes. Me thinks she doth protest too much and is only looking for someone--or someTHING--to blame.

I've been trying for years to get this company to protect itself more efficiently and more often but my suggestions go unheard. Frankly, madam, I am happy to be leaving. You're firing me? I QUIT.

Here's the farewell kiss, you dog. I hope you like humiliation with those nice, clean khaki pants.

So sincerely,

Your Goddamn Monthly Cycle.


  1. i think you might be on to a comic series with this.. i like..

  2. I've thought about it actually...I think I've got enough period-puns for about two more.


Please share some knowledge. Or amuse me at least :O